I Promise You
by Maryxiah
Summary: A fanfiction featuring characters from the hit korean drama - Boys Over Folwers, focusing on the most beloved Soeul couple, So Yijung and Chu Gaeul
1. Chapter One: Give up

**Chapter one: Give up**

Flashback

_... "Thanks to a certain someone, I've realized how much you can regret something after you've given up on it."_

End of flashback

Touching her lips, remembering the almost kiss scene between them, her heart beat even faster and louder. _What should I do? _Gaeul thought.

Flashback

…"_Fool…" he said, almost in a whisper, tears welled up in his eyes. "You know I'm a fool, more than anyone else in the world! How could you have given me such hard problem?!"_

"_Start over! Start over! Let me start it over!" He cried out, overwhelmed with regret that he had let go the woman that he loved the most._

_Sunbae… Gaeul watched him cry, silently crying with him. Sunsaengnim (teacher)…you must have loved her a lot._

End of flashback

Just the thought of Eunjae reminds Gaeul of her words - don't live to regret something that your heart yearns for.

Flashback

…"_I couldn't get it through him…my heart, that is. Surprisingly after that, I felt as if all my feelings are emptied out, and I thought maybe this is where it ends," she said with a smile._

"_Didn't it hurt?" Gaeul asked._

"_I have done everything I wanted without regrets, so it didn't hurt. Gaeul sshi, you too, should go for it so you don't live to regret it later."_

End of flashback

****

Working in the porridge shop has been a drag for her lately, but it was the only job that can keep her sane. Memories of Jandi overflow in every corner of the shop, Gaeul's heart sank with a hint of guilt.

Cleaning up the dishes on the table, Gaeul silently sighed. A lot of things went through her mind. Mostly of Jandi, who's currently gone missing. And a certain someone who she can never get out of her mind.

The door slowly opened and in comes Yijung with his ever comforting smile.

"Yijung sunbae."

****

It was quite a surprise that Yijung would even come to a place like this that Gaeul can't help but to stare at him, bewildered as he usher her in.

"Fast food restaurant?"

Yijung grinned, pleased with his little effort. "I thought you might like a place like this. It's quite popular, I've heard."

"Ah…I don't really know," she admitted. "Other than the porridge shop, I barely go anywhere else. I'm a dull person after all."

"Gaeul yang," he said as she turned to look at him. "You're anything but a dull person."

Feeling a little embarrassed, Gaeul cleared her throat and decided to look for a place to sit while Yijung offered to order some food for them.

Handing over the food to her, Yijung took the chance to observe her closely. _Gaeul yang…_

"Still haven't heard anything from Jandi?" he asked.

"Yeah, I really don't know what to think. She turned off her cellphone and only said that she was going somewhere," she said.

"She's probably fine. She's Geum Jandi after all," he said, wanting to comfort her.

"It seems like you know my friend better than I am."

"I told you, I know a little bit about women," he joked, making her smile at the mere attempt.

"How is Junpyo sunbae holding up?"

"He's a mess." He didn't elaborate, because Junpyo and Jandi's crisis was only an excuse for him to meet up with her.

"Gaeul yang," he finally managed. "Now…should we have a talk about us?"

Avoiding his gaze, Gaeul knew this was coming. "Sunbae, this food is really delicious!" she evaded, taking a small bite of the hamburger, hoping that'd make it clear she's not ready for another Yijung bombshell.

****

Walking down the stairs at Namsan, Gaeul wondered what Yijung might try to say.

"Gaeul yang, I…"

"I'll go first," she cut him off, feared that he might shoot her down and hurt her more than he already has. "You don't have to feel any obligation towards me. I know everything… how you feel," _of how much you still cares for her._ "That's why from now on, I won't go looking for you anymore."

"Gaeul yang," he tried to explain.

"Sunsaengnim (teacher)," she stopped. "No, Eunjae sunsaengnim said that she had done everything she wanted so she has no regrets or lingering feelings. Thank you for giving me the chance to try my best."

Forcing a smile, she continued "When I hear from Jandi, I'd be sure to let you know immediately. Well, then…" and turned to leave.

Taken aback, Yijung continue to stare after her as she slowly walked away from there. Yijung felt as if a massive concrete was being weigh down on his chest. Unable to breath in the painful realization that he might just have lost something so important to him. Could it be? That he's in love with Gaeul? Only to realize it after she decided to give up on him?

****


	2. Chapter Two: The three of us

**Chapter two: The three of us**

As usual, in the pottery class Gaeul'd study closely on Eunjae's every move, wondering on each gesture, which might have captured Yijung's attention the most? Could it be the gentle smile? The mellow voice? Or the tender look on her face as she molds the clay into a fine piece of art?

Eunjae happened to catch her eyes and raised an eyebrow. _Hmm?_

The classroom soon emptied out, leaving the two of them in awkward smiles and silence.

"Gaeul sshi, what is it?" Eunjae asked with a concern look.

Gaeul lightly shook her head, "It's nothing."

"I'm sure it's something. Want to talk about it?" Eunjae slowly walked towards Gaeul and sit beside her.

Gaeul pondered on it for a moment before letting it all out. "I gave up on him."

Surprised, Eunjae asked, "On that potter friend?"

Gaeul nodded. "No matter how hard I try, I won't be able to replace that someone in his heart. He knows how I feel for him, but he keeps reminding me that I shouldn't read too much into our friendship."

"Gaeul sshi…Do you love him that much?"

Gaeul heaved a sigh. "I wonder…" With a far away look she continued, "probably more than I'd ever know."

"Then you should try your best to let him know of that," Eunjae encouraged.

"Huh?"

"One thing I learned from experience is 'never to be subtle in love'. If you love him, say it. Put it into words. Actions are not enough. He needs to hear it from you. Those three words." Eunjae said with a smile. "My fiancé and I, we came a long way before realizing that those love words are fundamental in a relationship."

"Fi-fiancé?" Gaeul stammered, stunned by the revelation.

"Oh…another childhood friend of mine," Eunjae said with a big smile, blissful look shine on her face. "Someone who has been there for me probably ages before I finally opened my eyes to see him. Sometimes you'd just get caught off guard, but love would always find a way to sneak in and you can't help but to hope for the best."

_Fiancé…Sunsaengnim has a fiancé. _Those words kept repeating in her head. _Sunbae_, she thought. _Do you know about this?_

****

Yijung wondered why he'd come here, out of all places. He had been wandering aimlessly for a few hours, trying to clear the mess in his head, not realizing that his feet carried him here.

Walking in, he saw the two of them sitting next to each other, in deep conversation.

"Gaeul yang," the words escape him.

Both head turned towards his direction.

Eunjae wondered if she heard him wrong. "Yijung ah."

"Sunbae," Gaeul's voice was so low, Eunjae can barely hear her.

Everything clicked in as the two of them exchanged intense gaze._ Potter friend_, Eunjae thought.

Gaeul broke off the gaze and took the cue to excuse herself, feeling that she might be at the wrong place at wrong time, even though Yijung was the one who interrupted.

"I just remembered that I have something to take care of. I'll see you next week sunsaengnim," Gaeul said as she rushed out of the classroom, pretending she didn't know Yijung and walked past him without even an eye contact.

"Gaeul sshi," Eunjae called out, only to notice Yijung's pale face.

_Yijung ah…_

****

"I'm a bit jealous." Eunjae's words broke off the silence and brought him out of his trance. "Yijung, you've never looked at me that way before."

Yijung was speechless. Being in an awkward situation like this was something he's not used to. How should he explain to his first love about this girl, who meant something to him? Something that even he can't find a word to describe.

"Gaeul yang…she's…" Yijung paused, looking away. "a friend."

Biting her lips, Eunjae really envy Gaeul for having such effect on him. Even though they weren't meant to be, it hurt to see him care for another girl, and it's someone she know.

"Just…a friend?" she prodded. "Then again, you're famous for having so many girl friends," she joked.

"She's not!" he almost raised his voice. "She's not…not what you think."

_Yijung ah…you've changed so much. Could it be? That you're in love with Gaeul too?_

"Yijung ah…you…" _love her?_ "like her?"

His silence said it all.

****


	3. Chapter Three: Ambiguity

**Chapter three: Ambiguity**

Flashback

"_Wh-what kind of a question is that?" He didn't look at her as he said, "Of course I like her, Gaeul yang is a good friend." He wasn't exactly answering her question and she wasn't even sure if she wanted to hear it._

End of flashback

"So…who do you think we should break the news to first?" Ilhyun asked, eager to announce to the world that Eunjae will soon be officially his. His one and only.

However, Eunjae who's lost in her train of thoughts didn't hear him. Staring into space as if it holds the secret to the happiness in the world.

Waving his hand hoping to catch her attention, Ilhyun wondered why she was behaving so strangely today. And the gloomy face, she can't hide it from him.

Eunjae snapped out of it as she realized Ilhyun was watching her. "Sorry…"

"Something happened?" he asked, concerned with Eunjae's sudden gloom, which he was afraid might mean one thing – Yijung. Now that they've meet again, he's getting more anxious. "Did you…meet him today?"

"Oh? Uh…" Eunjae sighed, "Nothing escapes you, is it?"

He smiled weakly, feeling a little wary that it was indeed Yijung. "He still doesn't know?"

She nodded. "I didn't tell him." Looking at his frowned expression, Eunjae asked "Are you upset…because I haven't told him?"

Meeting her eyes, he gave her a warm smile. Trying to be understanding like he always have been, for her. "No, I understand. It's not easy. He is after all plays a big part in both of our lives. Should we tell him together," he offered.

Eunjae hesitated. Should they?

Seeing her uncertainty, it's like a sense of déjà vu. He won't go through this for the second time. He just… won't. "It's a lie."

His statement shocked her. "Eh?" Eunjae knew exactly what he meant by that. "Ilhyun ah…"

"No lingering feelings, totally letting go of the past and moving on. It's all a lie," he stated, not once did he look at her. He can't. He won't. "One can never completely let go. Even death can't make you let go."

"Ilhyun ah …"

"Go home. I don't think we can continue this conversation tonight," he said as he left the table and went back to the kitchen, to his favorite sanctuary.

"Don't you trust me?" she questioned him. She will not let past mistake to hunt her again. It had been a roller coaster ride when she was holding on to Yijung all those years, and she swore she won't go through it again. Ilhyun…he's the one for her now.

_Wind, that's what I had been for you, Yijung ah. I wasn't your air and neither are you mine. Ilhyun is_, she said to herself.

Walking towards him from behind, she held him in a tight embrace, wishing that she's able to make him believe in her.

"You were right, one can never completely let go. It'd be a lie, to say I have no lingering feelings for him," she boldly admitted. "Ten years. Being by his side for all those years, all those memories, all those love and care, can't just disappear into a thin air. He will always be a part of me, nothing's gonna change that fact. But Ilhyun ah, the moment you put the ring on my finger, I have decided, it's you that I'd spend the rest of my life with. It's you." That is the truth.

Tears streaming down her cheek, Ilhyun can feel the dampness on the back of his clothes. Taking her hands in his, feeling the engagement ring on her finger, Ilhyun felt reassured. No more words needed. They've both reached a silent conformity.

****

He didn't miss it, the ring on her finger. It was definitely an engagement ring. Mixed emotions, Yijung can't be sure if he was heartbroken. One thing for sure, he's not getting drunk like a fool he had been before.

Eunjae…she had been a very special person to him. Someone so important he wished he could have gone back and change everything. He should have guessed, remembering the billboards message. Why else would a girl like her stay beside him all those years? If only he had realized it sooner. But Ilhyun hyung, he probably deserved her more.

And then there's Gaeul. The girl who made his heart beat for the first time after Eunjae's disappearance. In a way, she reminded him too much of Eunjae he was afraid that he might use her to replace Eunjae's part in his life. Her thoughtfulness when it comes to him. Her assertiveness whenever he's giving up. Her smile and her cheers, different but yet so similar to that of Eunjae's.

_No, Gaeul yang…I can't hurt her_, he thought. To think he almost did that by trying to ask her out that day, at the Namsan stairway. But if she doesn't mean anything, why did he felt so empty inside the moment she turned her back and leave? Why did he felt overwhelmed with her decision to let go of her feelings for him? Could it be that the country bumpkin had hurt his ego? Or did she unintentionally open up a room in his heart without him even realizing it?

_Aniya, that can't be. This is Gaeul yang. I can't possibly be…am I?_

****

_Sunbae…Why do I always make a fool of myself when it comes to you? When did I become such a loser?_

She lied. She can't possible let go of him, at least not this instance. For all the hurt he brought onto her, she's still very much in love with him. Wait, will it be right for her to recognize this feeling as love? Should it be a strong feeling or a sense of admiration and etc.?

No. It was love all right.

****


	4. Chapter Four: It’s time to let go

**Chapter four: It's time to let go**

"Yo, Yijung ah? Where are you? Why didn't you come to our place earlier?" said the familiar voice from the other end of the line.

Yijung sighed. "I'm not really up for any drama between those two. What's with Jandi's missing and all, I bet Junpyo is being a bad ass again."

Woobin lightly nodded. "Actually, Jihoo found Jandi's whereabouts and try to convince Junpyo to come with him. But that fool flatly refused. I don't know what's wrong with him these days. He even told Jihoo that he can go look for her himself if he wants to." Woobin sounded more like a big brother than a friend.

"Mwoh (what)? I thought he was going crazy when she left and now he doesn't want to see her? He's not sulking, is he?" Yijung mocked, slightly amused at the notion of Junpyo in his sulking mode.

Woo Bin smiled weakly, wondering what he should do to clean up the mess. "He said that he doesn't want to hurt her more than he already has."

"But she's Geum Jandi, the strong weed!" Yijung protested.

"I know. But you have to understand, she's the woman that Junpyo loves. That's the more reason why he won't meet her, he can't bear to see her cry, let alone open another wound in her heart. I guess he's trying to protect her in his own way." Yijung can hear Woobin sigh from the end of the line. "But I don't think Junpyo is being fair to Jihoo. Trying to lead him on again by being Jandi's hero and in the end, Jihoo might get hurt too," Woobin voiced out his thought.

Yijung couldn't agree more. What had brought the four of them so close together would probably be the loneliness. Despite it all, Yijung has always thought that Jihoo might be the loneliest out of all. Being an orphan at a tender age, growing up alone in his household and being the silent introvert he is, Jihoo…that poor guy doesn't deserve to get hurt again.

"Remember back when we were still kids, Jihoo would always let Junpyo bullied him and never make a sound? I've always thought that maybe it was for fear, because Junpyo is the heir to Shinhwa Group and all, but now that I think it over, Jihoo is not the kind to care for such thing," he recalled. "Maybe, it was for fear of losing Junpyo as a friend instead," Yijung reasoned. "He's doing it all over again."

Woobin can feel himself being mellow. "Sometimes I just hate seeing Jihoo starts to smile again. Because…that smile is what killing him inside. Good thing he has his grandpa by his side now." Woobin shook his head and suddenly cried out. "Ah, Molla! We should stop talking about them or I think I'll go nuts," he admitted.

"Tch...when did you become such a sissy," Yijung joked.

"I swear one of these days you guys would really make me go bald."

Yijung chuckled.

"So, how's it going for our master Yijung these days?" Woo Bin changed the subject. "Anything you want to share?"

"Do you have to stick your nose into everyone's business?" Yijung said, half joking.

"I'm afraid I have to." He shrugged." You bunch of weaklings need me," he said and laughed whole heartedly for the first time in the past few stressful weeks.

Yijung can't help but to laugh with him. "You rascal."

****

Yijung breathed out a sigh. Now comes the hard part– meeting up with Gaeul and let her know about Jandi. He knows how much she's in guilty conscience for Jandi's disappearance, believing that she's one of the reasons why Jandi choose to leave. Seems like everyone's mood turned bitter with Junpyo-Jandi crisis, Yijung barely sees Gaeul's smile anymore. Or was it his fault?

The sudden crack sound of the door made him jumped and looked over._ Eunjae…_

"Did I catch you on a bad timing?" she asked.

"No," he said with a smile, curious that she suddenly came up to him after everything that had happened.

"Can we talk for a bit?"

"Oh, sure." He motioned her to sit on the long chairs right beside him.

She had been to his studio for countless of time before that she shouldn't feel out of place, but yet she felt like a stranger intruding into his space. Maybe after all that it's worth, they have been a stranger to each other now. Time and space do that.

"It's been a while since I came here. Nothing seems to change but it felt different," she said.

"But I never change anything in here," he said, not realizing she meant something else by that.

"Maybe it's because you've changed," she stated.

"Have I?" He seriously doubted it.

Focusing back to the reason why she came, Eunjae started "Everytime we meet, we'd always end up talking about the past." _Because that's the only thing we have – the past._ "But we never really end it in the right way. Some things just left hanging, don't you think?"

Yijung looked down on his hands, half guessing where this conversation heading.

"Yijung ah…"

"I know," he cut her off. "about you and Ilhyun hyung," he continued. "I saw the two of you together."

Eunjae's eyes opened wide in surprise but she managed to hold it in. "You did?" she asked carefully.

He nodded, "You guys looked good together. And that ring on your finger is hard to miss," he said with a smile, neither a forced smile nor a happy smile. Just something he thought was appropriate.

Eunjae looked down on her hands and observed the ring more closely. "Yijung ah, remember the favor I asked of you three years ago? Did you ever go there?" She needed to know.

He only nodded, can't figure out whether he should tell her that he had only been there recently.

_So, he knew? About my feelings all this time?_ "I was a fool, wasn't I?" she said, trying to make light of the situation.

"You're not a fool!" he insisted. "You know how important you are to me, right?" he added soon after.

"I know. I'm the comfort zone and the safe haven for the troubled Yijung," she said.

"It's not like that. It was never like that," he objected.

"Ani (no), that's exactly what I have been for you, Yijung ah. Whenever you need me, I'd come to you and it'd always be me who come to you. It has never been the other way around. Yijung, you probably don't know me as much as you think you do."

"Cha Eunjae!"

"Tell me, what's my favorite color, food or season? The song that I love to hear? My deepest fear?" She wondered if he even remembered the answer to her last question.

Yijung hesitated.

"It's white, kimchi and winter. The song that I love to hear is Clementine. My deepest fear…"

"Losing the one you love," that he knows.

Eunjae smile at the bitter revelation. "Do you know Gaeul sshi favorite color, food or season?"

_Red_- _she likes to wear red, she eats everything, Gaeul (summer)-after her name,_ he thought.

"You do know, don't you?" she prodded. Looking away, Eunjae felt that she has gotten all the answers to her questions. And it's time to let go of the past and embrace the present. "Yijung ah, don't run away and hide again. Don't hurt the one you love. That special person only comes once in a lifetime," she said, reminding him of his father's word. "Once you missed it, you can't go back again. This time, you just might lose your air."

Their eyes meet and Yijung can pretty much figure out her message. "Eunjae…"

"Well, I need to go now. Ilhyunnie is waiting for me. We'll see you next time. Most preferably in a proper meeting with both our parents," she said. "Remember well what I just told you, okay?"

Yijung just mutedly watched her leaving, not seeing the tears in her eyes as she walked out of the studio. It was weird for him not to crumble as she walked out of his life once again. Could it be that he had finally let go too?

****


	5. Chapter Five: I just…need you here

**Chapter five: I just…need you here**

"Yijung ah, come to the hospital right now! It's Junpyo-" Woobin said frantically, catching his breath as he rushed to his car.

At the mention of Junpyo's name, Yijung can sense the emergency alert. "Araso, I'm on my way," Yijung too, sprinted towards his sports car and headed straight for the hospital. His thoughts filled with dreadful images of possible accident involving Junpyo.

_Junpyo ah…_

As soon as he got there, Yijung could see that everyone was pretty shaken by the fact that Junpyo's currently battling for his life in the emergency room. Jihoo especially, looked like he has just been slapped by Death God. His eyes so wide opened, his face as white as snow, focusing his sole attention on Jandi. Jandi, on the other hand, was looking down at her hands with tears in her eyes. Woobin, who has been standing by Jihoo side nodded knowingly at Yijung and motioned him to come forward. Yijung felt heavy in his chest, crushing emotions accompanied his every step.

"Noona," Yijung greeted as he realized Gu Junhee was there, sitting right next to Jandi.

No words from her except a weak nod and tear streaked face.

After hours of waiting outside the emergency room, President Kang's unexpected arrival threw everyone off guard. Despite her cold and heartless appearance, there's a hint of genuine concern in her eyes.

Gu Junhee, unable to contain her anger, confronted her mother in front of everyone, "Are you happy now? Is this what you wanted? You said this was all for Junpyo in the end." President Kang remained silent all the while as Gu Junhee continues, "Do you know the things that your son enjoys eating, what he likes, what he wants to do?"

Soon after, Secretary Jung confirmed that Junpyo's surgery went smoothly and that he was out of critical state. Hearing that, President Kang turned to leave for her important meeting, believing that her presence was no longer needed.

Gu Junhee, feeling more fire up by her mother's callousness, cried out, "Was our father not enough?! Tell me, what is important to you? Shinhwa or Junpyo?!"

President Kang stopped dead on her track for a good five minutes before leaving Gu Junhee in tears.

Gu Junhee, with her gentle loving character, for once losing it, was the first time for the boys. But it was understandable for her to behave in such manner. Find out that their father was still alive after all that months of believing he was dead and her brother, drove close to madness by her own mother…who could blame her?

Jandi ran after President Kang after the blow, thinking that she should say something to her. Anything. She was after all, Junpyo's mother.

****

Jihoo and Gu Junhee left soon after Junpyo was being transferred to his ward, leaving only Woobin and Yijung in the room, looking after Junpyo.

_Gaeul yang_, Yijung abruptly thought of her. _I should call her and tell her that Jandi's here_, Yijung contemplated as he took out his cellphone and look for her number.

Woobin, sitting next to Yijung on the couch near Junpyo's bed, focused intently on Junpyo. In the meantime, thinking what a mess this has been and feeling helpless that there's nothing he can do. Looking over and noticed that Yijung has been staring at his cellphone for the longest time, he asked, "Contacting someone?"

"Oh, yeah…" Yijung replied. "I was thinking…should I call Gaeul and let her know about Jandi?"

_Gaeul? _Woobin wondered. "Yah, what's with the sudden thought of her?"

"Aniya, she's been worried sick for Jandi, I just thought she might want to know that she's here now. That's all," Yijung explained, sounding defensive as he spoke.

Woobin chuckled, ridiculously amused by Yijung's face expression when he mentioned about Gaeul. Knowing it was not the right time and place to continue teasing him, Woobin turned serious once again and said, "Maybe you should, Jandi…she probably need Gaeul more than anyone at this moment."

****

Gaeul ran as fast as she could, rushing into the hospital and search anxiously for Junpyo's ward room.

_Jandi ah…_

She was ready to turn in for the night when she received the call from Yijung. Not expecting it to be news about Jandi, she nearly dropped her cellphone at the mention of hospital. A part of her was hoping, he was calling for another reason. A reason so ludicrous even she thought was impossible.

When she arrived, both Woobin and Yijung were standing outside the room.

"Sunbae," she said and they both turned towards her direction.

"Gaeul yang," Yijung responded, somehow relieved to be able to see her face after all the chaos today.

"Where's Jandi?"

"She's inside. With Junpyo." This time it was Woobin's turn to speak.

Gaeul's eyes opened wide. "He's awake?"

Woobin shook his head. "No, he hasn't. He's in a coma. The doctors weren't sure how long he'll stay that way, but he's safe now."

Gaeul was relieved to hear that. "That's good."

"Jandi probably has so much to say to him, she's been in there for a while now," Woobin said. "Come on, let's go to the cafeteria and get some drink," Woobin invited.

"No, I'm going to wait for Jandi here. I'm here for her after all," Gaeul protested.

Woobin sighed, slightly annoyed. "It's okay, I'll go and get some drink for everyone instead. How about a cup of coffee?" he offered.

Gaeul and Yijung both nodded.

"Okay, good," Woobin said as he patted Yijung shoulder and went on his way to the cafeteria.

"Thank you," Gaeul said, not long after Woobin's gone.

"Huh?"

"For contacting me," she replied. "If it wasn't for you, I'd probably still clueless about this. Especially now, during the times that Jandi needed me the most. Thank you," she repeated.

"Gaeul yang- I'm sure Jandi is very thankful to have a friend like you, who cares a lot about her," Yijung said with a smile.

"Yijung sunbae, won't you want to be there first hand if something happened to either one of the F4 sunbae? It's the same for us," she said.

Yijung smiled at her reasoning, observing her closely at the same time._ Her eyes looked tired_, he thought. Maybe he shouldn't have called her after all.

"I have my own selfish reason for calling you tonight," he admitted. "Because I know I'd feel better if you're here. And I just...need you here, right beside me."

Yijung smiled at her reasoning. "I have my own selfish reason for calling you tonight," he admitted. "Because I know I'd feel better if you're here."

Gaeul could her cheeks reddened, her heart tingled and butterfly in her stomach. She knows she shouldn't feel over excited because this couldn't mean anything more. So Yijung was infamous for his sweet lines, he's most likely saying this to make her feel better or straight up trying to embarrass her knowing she'd blush at the mere words.

"Yo yo, coffee's here!" Woobin announced as he walked towards them, drinks on his hands.

Yijung sighed. "That was…pretty fast."

Woobin shrugged as he handed over the coffee to them and sipped his own. "Not bad," he commented, totally oblivious to Yijung's sharp gaze.

Gaeul, relieved by the sudden interruption, smiled as she took a sip of her own coffee, wondering if Yijung had meant something else by his words.

****


	6. Chapter Six: Once in a lifetime

**Chapter six: Once in a lifetime**

Once again, the boys gathered up at their favorite hangout to discuss ways of recovering Junpyo's memory of Jandi, which had startled everyone at first. Who could have guessed Junpyo would forget about Geum Jandi – the love of his life. If it was his witch mother, they'd probably understand, but Jandi - the girl who he'd protect with his life? It was almost unbelievable.

After the discussion, Jandi had headed home for the day. Jihoo offered to drive her home but she refused, and he didn't prod knowing it was certainly an awkward moment for them now. Jandi had looked so tired and depressed that the boys felt the heartache too. This was the first time they had tried so hard to protect a girl, not just because she's the woman that Junpyo love but because she's Geum Jandi, F4's Geum Jandi.

Silence filled the space as she left. Everyone was deep in their own thoughts. Yijung chose the moment to break the news to his lifelong buddy. "I'm...probably going to study abroad soon."

"What?!" Woobin opened wide in surprise.

Even the quiet Jihoo turned to look at him. "Why?" he asked.

"I'm not running away," Yijung calmly explained.

Woobin frowned. "Then, what is this?" he demanded, overly annoyed by his F4 boys lately.

Yijung smiled. "My way of growing up," he said.

Woobin smirked. "Are you kidding me?"

"Junpyo," he began and all eyes on him. "He has grown to be a man we're all proud of over the times after he met Jandi. Being his strength, being his conscience, being his everything. He has become a better and improved Junpyo because of her. He might not remember her now but his heart does, I'm sure," he said referring to Junpyo's selective amnesia.

Jihoo spaced out at the mention of both Jandi and Junpyo. The guilt was eating him alive. Just as the moment he chose to put his heart on the line and confessed to Jandi, his best friend put himself in danger to save him. How would he ever get out of this guilt, he wondered. Maybe fate was trying to tell him, it wasn't meant to be – Geum Jandi and him. No matter how hard he'd try.

"I owe it to one person. That better man in me," Yijung explained as he looked at his right hand. "I'm going to recover, do pottery again and recreate myself." And then he added, "For her."

"Yijung ah…" Woobin can almost guess who he was talking about.

"I thought it was going to be that one girl. I used to believe she'd be the only one. The only girl I'd ever come to love. Like how Seohyun noona was to Jihoo," Yijung said with a faraway look, knocking Jihoo out of his trance.

Woobin recalled that one night, three years ago, when Yijung broke down in tears for the first time, wailing that she was gone and he had lost her forever. It was then he knew about Eunjae, not knowing her personally but able to guess how much she meant to Yijung.

"Because I believed she'd always be there, I settled into my comfort zone. Because I believed if nothing changes between us, I won't lose her. Because I was afraid I might hurt her, I hurt the both of us. Because I was selfish and immature, I ran away. Because of all that, I lost someone so important to me," he said, remembering the 'once in a lifetime' puzzle Eunjae gave him.

Flashback

"_I was not the air, Yijung ah, but rather the wind that you mistook for air," she explained. "I think I am the wind. I made a mistake of thinking that I was the air and that I could've stay beside you forever," she said._

"_What are you trying to say? I don't even understand a word you're saying."_

"_For the wind, once it passed by, it can't return to the place it had been, Yijung ah."_

End of flashback

"She told me she wasn't the one, because our missed chance proved that we can never go back to the way we were," Yijung added. "She was right. She was holding on to me for the longest time in hope I'd realize how much she loved me. After she was gone, I was holding onto her in hope she'd realize that I did love her. If she had been the one, my 'once in a lifetime' match, I think no matter how far I'd ran I'd still be with her. But that never was the case for us."

"Yijung ah," Woobin said, hearing Yijung profound revelation.

"Eunjae, I think I can finally let her go. No more holding onto the past," Yijung said.

"Are you saying we won't see the emo Yijung again?" Woobin teased, trying to lighten up the mood.

Yijung smiled. "I think when I found that 'once in a lifetime' person, I will hold onto her so tight she won't be able to breath. Like how Junpyo is with Jandi," he admitted, his thought filled with one particular person. "And I want to be able to admit freely," he paused, "that I want a future with her. That I love her."

Jihoo snapped off his usual quiet mode and spoke again, "If you really love Gaeul, don't be a coward fool that run for the hill for fear of getting hurt again."

Yijung was stunned. "What?"

"Can you be anymore slow? That 'once in a lifetime' you're talking about, it's staring you in the face. Can't you see it? Being blind and pretending to be blind are two different things," Jihoo said, as a matter-of-factly. Jihoo might not be around much to see Yijung and Gaeul moment, but he was not oblivious to the fact that those two were in love. The look in their eyes, he could feel them.

"It doesn't come in a perfect package that you'd know right away. But you should know more than anyone else, how you felt for her. If you care for her, don't deny it," Jihoo advised, recalling his own missed chance with Jandi.

Even Woobin was surprised to hear this from Jihoo. Jandi, she was sure something, to be able to change the Jihoo that they knew. Jihoo, despite being on his brighter side lately was never one to be blunt and observant about these things because he simply couldn't put his mind to focus on things that doesn't concern him.

"Wow, we have a love expert now?" Woobin joked.

Jihoo wasn't really up to for more discussion. He was getting sleepier despite his full effort to stay awake for his friends' sake. "Whatever. I think I'm gonna go home and turn in for the night. I'm beat," Jihoo said as he stood up and leave. "See you guys later."

Yijung couldn't deny that Jihoo words had hit him hard, because Jihoo had spoken out loud the secret that his heart been keeping. For once, Yijung can see clearly what fate had installed for him all along – that 'once in a lifetime'.

****


	7. Chapter Seven: A true confession

**Chapter seven: A true confession**

Jandi and Gaeul both let out a loud sigh as they sat together in the porridge shop, staring into spaces, lifeless as they were baffling on their own love life problem. Not much of a love life for Gaeul but still… There hasn't been much customer since this morning either, not that there ever was a busy time in the porridge shop anyway. As for the master, he's not the kind to nag and he's acting more like their friend than the owner of the place, which makes the girls felt more relaxed there.

"There's this song that I've been listening to these days," Gaeul broke off the silence. "that without a heart, we can't feel the pain of loving someone."

Jandi glanced over at Gaeul. "But, without a heart…you won't be able to love anyone," she argued.

"That's the whole point. Without heart, we won't be able to love and thus protect ourselves from getting hurt," Gaeul said.

"That's rather cowardly, don't you think? I'd rather get hurt because of love than not knowing love at all." Jandi said, missing Junpyo more and more by the second. "Even though you'd sometimes get hurt, but the bittersweet of the pain you're enduring will all be washed away by the warmth of your love. I'm not making a sense, am I?" Jandi said with a smile.

"Aniya, you're right. Not knowing love and not being able to love someone, that's probably the greatest pain of all," Gaeul agreed, spaced out again soon after.

"Gaeul, are you okay?" Jandi asked, truly concerned by her gloominess lately. It's not like her to be in such bitter mood.

"Oh…yeah. Why do you ask?" Gaeul faked a smile.

"For one, you're not the kind to be listening to sad love song. And who can miss that dark cloud over your head," Jandi said.

Gaeul nervously laughed it off. "Ah…ani, I heard that this song has gotten really popular on minihompi, that's why I started listening to it. I'm just trying something new I guess."

Jandi, not convinced, took Gaeul's hand on hers. "Gaeul ah, I'm sorry."

"What are you talking about? Sorry for what?" Gaeul was confused.

"For not being a very good friend for you lately," Jandi replied. "I wasn't around during the times that you need me. Gu Junpyo, he changed my life and turned it upside down for most of the time and you'd be there for me everytime. I know something is up between you and Yijung sunbae, but I hadn't been able to be there for you instead. Because I was running away," Jandi said.

"Aniya," Gaeul said. "I know you were trying to protect me from President Kang, that's why you left. Jandi, you're not superwoman. You can't make everyone happy. Seeing you're back, safe and sound, is more important to me than anything else."

"Gaeul ah," Jandi said as she hugged Gaeul.

Gaeul patted Jandi's back. "Just be strong Jandi ah, I'm sure Junpyo sunbae will remember you soon. How can he not? That man is really in love with you."

****

Late into the afternoon, Woobin and Yijung arrived at the porridge shop, surprising the girls by announcing they were having lunch there. After around ten minutes of waiting, they found themselves to be served with delicious food and began to eat.

Meanwhile the girls can't help but to watch them in puzzlement from nearby seats, wondering why they were there. Out of all the places in Seoul, they HAD to have their lunch in their porridge shop?

Finally, when they're done eating, they were still holding up from telling their real reason for being there.

"Come on, tell us. Why are you guys here?" Gaeul asked.

Both of the guys smiled meaningfully to each other before Woobin finally said something. "Jandi, she's too busy with her part time jobs that she has neglected to take care of her own boyfriend," Woobin stated.

"Eh," Jandi said, not getting him.

"Junpyo has been released from the hospital," they broke the news.

Jandi immediately perked up, genuinely thrilled with the news and eager to see Junpyo.

"Hurry. Go," Woobin encouraged her.

Jandi nodded, excitedly stood up and took off her apron. With Gaeul's help, she rushed off within a minute. "I'll be back soon," she said, before leaving with a wide smile on her face.

Woobin nodded knowingly to Yijung, followed closely behind Jandi and left the porridge shop.

"Sunbae, you're not leaving?" Gaeul asked after noticing that Yijung had stayed behind.

"No, I came because of you Gaeul yang," he said.

****

It has been quite some time since they've arrived there and looked at the clay baking in a kiln. Gaeul could feel something was up. Whenever he came to her, he'd always have something in mind, most of the times it was because of Junpyo and Jandi. But she knew better that this time, it has something to do with her – Chu Gaeul.

Yijung, on the other hand, was collecting his thoughts, wondering how he should begin. Gaeul, would she understand the reason he's doing this? What would be her respond? Would she even care? Yijung hated himself for feeling helpless and needy when it comes to Gaeul. When did he start to care so much, he wondered.

_Commoner, it's really dangerous when you start to fall for them_, he thought.

"They look happy…those plates inside. Rather than thinking they're hurting in the heat, it feels like they're happy. Because they're full of hope that if they endure this, they can come out and receive love." Gaeul felt the need to break the chain of silence.

"It's something that you, Gaeul yang would say," Yijung said with a smile.

"So…tell me. What is it that you wanted to tell me? Whatever it is, I'm ready. So you can just spit it out."

"I have both, bad news and good news. Should I start with the bad news again?" he offered. When she didn't respond, he continued, "I'm…" and paused for a second, "leaving."

Gaeul's heart skipped a beat. Looking at him as if he slapped her on the face, which he certainly had with a news like that.

"But then again, this might not be a bad news for you," he said, trying to figure out what she might say to that.

"To where?" she asked.

"Sweden."

"When…no, for how long?" she stammered, failed to pretend that she doesn't care.

"Soon…Maybe around 4-5 years?" He remained a straight face. Not wanting to show the vulnerable side of him to this girl again.

"That's good," Attempting to be supportive of his decision. "You'll go and become an even better clay artist," she reasoned. "Now that I think of it, this could also be a good news. What's the other news?"

He hesitated_. Should I say this now? _he thought. _I need more time. But I'd lose her if I don't. _

Bracing himself, swallowing the lump in his throat as he began to admit something he recently come to realize. "When I come back, Gaeul yang, you'll be the first person I'd look for."

_There, I said it!_

Startled, she only managed to say "Sunbae…"

Uncomfortable with his less subtle confession, he added, "I mean, if you can't find your soulmate by then."

Dup...dup...dup... His heart throbbed anxiously.

Gaeul broke into a smile. This might not be much of a confession but for Yijung sunbae to utter such words, that had meant a lot to Gaeul.

"Put in more firewood. Do you think it'll ever reach 1300 °c like this?" He tried to avert her attention, looking adorable with his awkwardness.

"I thought you didn't believe in soulmate?" She meant it as a joke.

It took a moment for him to answer. "A girl once told me that if she loses that special someone (soulmate), she'd regret it for the rest of her life," he stated. "Lately I have come to realize…there's one person in my life now that I can't afford to lose," he added without looking at her.

_Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God_, she thought.

****


	8. Chapter Eight: Let’s go on a date

**Chapter eight: Let's go on a date**

A whole week has passed since Yijung's little confession to Gaeul. After that day, he hadn't heard anything from her. Not a single call or a text message. Then again, Gaeul hardly ever call him if it wasn't for Jandi. He thought his little confession might have sent her running for the hill since he wasn't exactly the kind of guy Gaeul would want to get involved with. But, she looked rather pleased the other day? Wasn't she?

He was so tempted to make the move and find her. But instead of walking into the porridge shop and actually meet up with her, he was stuck looking at her from a nearby distance every so often.

But today, he planned to avoid that at all cost. He didn't want to turn into a maniac that stalks the girl he loves just because he had been missing her like crazy. That wouldn't be like him at all. He's the infamous So Yijung for goodness sake! Instead, Yijung spent the day strolling around his studio, packing up his pottery materials before his departure soon.

In the meantime, Yijung recalled last night's event when Yumi and Junpyo held up a party to announce their 'so-called plan' to go abroad together soon. However, it didn't turned out to be the way Yumi had planned because Jandi managed to bring Junpyo back to his senses and he finally remembered her.

Flashback

_Gu Junpyo – the guy was so terrified of swimming once upon a time, was swimming with all his might to Jandi and pulled her to the surface, where he tried to revive her. In a surge of panic, he ran a CPR on her while calling her name over and over again._

_Slowly regaining conscious, Jandi looked up and asked weakly, "Do you remember now?" _

"_Sorry," he said while holding her, his heart thudded so hard from the horror of almost losing the one reason his heart beat for._

"_Say my name again," she said._

_Junpyo held her tightly into an embrace, while whispering her name once again._

End of flashback

The mere thought of them brought a broad smile to Yijung's face. _Geum Jandi and Gu Junpyo, let's just hope you guys will learn the lessons by now and hold on tightly to each other_, Yijung mused.

A light sound on the door made him jumped and turned to see a lady in red standing in front of him.

"Sunbae." The sweet innocent smile greeted him.

"Gaeul yang…" he said, surprised to see her there. Could his eyes be deceiving him?

"Those two…they're finally back together!" she announced, as if she was breaking the news to him, when he already witnessed the whole thing last night.

"You came all the way to tell me that?" he asked, irritated the fact that Jandi was still the reason why she came to him.

"Not really," she admitted shyly. How can she tell him that he was the real reason she came? And that the overloaded thoughts of him nearly brought her to insanity. "Just had to get that out of my chest," she added. Her smile faded away as soon as she noticed the boxes on the tables. "You're packing up?" she asked.

Yijung looked over at the boxes. "Oh…mm. I'm going to leave soon. So I'm going to pack some stuff up before I leave," he explained.

The silence came to haunt as the big realization hit her. _He's going to leave soon. _

"Sunbae."An idea struck her like a bolt of lightning. "Let's go on a date…before you leave," she said.

"Huh?" Yijung's eyes opened wide in surprise. _Date?!_

"Well, a real date that is. So far, our dates have been pretend date and revenge date. Let's make new memory of the real one," she suggested, recalling their previous dates –helping her to revenge on Sunpyo date, trying to set Junpyo and Jandi up date and using her to spite his father date.

Yijung smirked at Gaeul's bold suggestion. "Gaeul yang, are you sure about this? A date with me? You're not afraid?"

Gaeul flinched for a second before recovering her confidence. "I should be the one to ask that question. Are you ready for a date with me?" There was a challenging tone in her voice.

Yijung chuckled. "Sure. Let's see what you have planned for us."

****

"Movie?" Yijung asked. _This is it?_

Coming from Gaeul, this was a bit plain and dull. He was slightly disappointed that Gaeul hasn't really planned anything fanciful for them. But then again, what would he expect from a country bumpkin like her? He'd probably experience one of those commoner dates that Junpyo had with Jandi before. Who knows he might enjoy it at the end of the day? He tried to remain optimistic for Gaeul.

Gaeul, with her cheeky smile dragged Yijung into the movie theater. "I bet you've never been to one of these public movie theaters right?"

Yijung shrugged. "I don't have too. I have my own private place to watch so I won't be disturbed by anyone," he replied, remained deadpan.

"Tch…show off!" She squinted. "Go on and get some popcorn while I get us some tickets," she said as she hurried over to the ticket line up.

"Popcorn?" he mumbled under his breath as he looked for a place to get it. His gaze landed on the long line of people standing in front of the popcorn booth. _What the – This must be a joke._

Unfortunately it wasn't and Yijung had to get on the line himself. When his eyes caught Gaeul laughing at him from a near distance, Yijung can't help but to smile, silently cursing himself for letting this girl to get away with this.

_But this isn't just any girl, it's my Gaeul yang,_ he thought quietly.

However, not even a minute into waiting, the line disappeared. Everyone, especially the girls who were whispering and cheering excitedly, obviously realized who he was and gave away their place for him. Yijung, clearly used to this kind attention, nodded a bit and smiled smugly as he went over to the booth and get the popcorn Gaeul asked for.

"Here," he said, holding up the popcorn to her, looking like a little kid giddy with his little achievement.

Gaeul can't help but to laugh at his adorable face. "Sunbae…" she said helplessly.

However Yijung's smile faltered the moment they entered into the theater. It was so packed with people and full of smells, Yijung could swear it was the worst kind of smell one can torture his nose with. And the fact that they had to squeeze in to get to their seats, which was a bad location itself, totally disheartened him from enjoying the movie.

_Aish…_he silently groaned.

The only good thing from this was the fact that Gaeul was holding his hand as she guided the way to their seats. The warmth of her hands sent shivers down his spine. As soon as they were seated, Gaeul was planning to let go of her hand when Yijung kept hold of her hands and squeezed it tight.

"Stay still," he ordered without looking at her.

Gaeul was glad that the light went dim at that very moment because she can't hide her blissful smile as he held her hands in his. Same goes for Yijung who focused intently on the screen, with a smile so wide his cheeks started to feel the effect.

****

"Scooter?!" he ridiculed at the sight of it.

Gaeul nodded, a huge silly smile plastered on her face. "I borrowed it from master," she said.

After the movie, she had insisted that they went back to the porridge shop because she wanted to get something. And later, she took him to the back of the shop and showed him this.

"So, this is what you meant by getting something from the porridge shop?" he asked again, feeling more and more ridiculous by Gaeul.

She nodded again. "Come on, just for once I hope you won't argue with me with whatever plans I may come up with and just enjoy this date."

"Okay," he said, taking a deep breath. "How do you expect me to ride this thing with you? I don't even know how to ride scooter," he said.

"You can just sit behind me," she said, as a matter-of-factly.

"What? I'm going to ride behind you?"

"Yeah…"she replied.

"Gaeul yang, you must be joking," he said, exasperated.

Gaeul ignored him and just get on the scooter and put on her helmet. "Put this on," she said and threw the helmet over to him.

"Yah…" he tried to argue.

"Ppalli (hurry)!" she urged him. When he didn't budge, Gaeul heaved a sigh. "Sunbae…are you really going to be like this?"

"This is really humiliating," he grumbled.

Gaeul bit her lips in frustration. "Fine! Suit yourself. I'm leaving," she said, starting the engine and get ready to leave.

"Wait," he finally called out. "Araso, araso. I'm coming," he said, feeling defeated as he put on the helmet and took the seat behind her.

Giddy with the feel of contentment, Gaeul took his hands and put them over her stomach and started the engine. "Ready?" she asked.

Yijung only manage a nod. Even though he was quite frustrated that Gaeul had forced him into doing this, but a part of him actually felt the situation was amusing and entertaining.

In the end, they spent the rest of the day riding the scooter to a lot of places – getting ice creams from various places and taking photos in Namsan. Yijung had to admit he was enjoying the ride, more than he thought he ever would. The ride itself wasn't that bad, or maybe Gaeul was the reason he was enjoying it? Whatever the reasons were, his heart was fluttering with excitement.

After the ride, they went on a hill to watch the sunset. The scene was so breathtaking and magical, Gaeul wished the time would freeze and she can capture the moment forever. Unbeknownst to her that he felt the same.

"Gaeul yang," he finally said. "Really thank you for today. It looks like I'm in debt with you," he said as he turned to look at her.

Gaeul, with a smile, turned to face him and said "Yep. And how are you going to repay me?" she asked, half joking.

Yijung smiled as he stared at her. His gaze fell to her crimson lips. Something tells him if he pulled back right now, right then he'd regret it for the rest of his life. Bracing himself for whatever to come, he inched his face closer to her, focusing his sole attention on her full, kissable lips. Their hearts were thumping so wild as their face drew closer. Gaeul's eyes slowly fluttered close as his lips were inches away.

****


	9. Chapter Nine: The goodbye

**Chapter nine: The goodbye**

As if on cue, his cellphone suddenly rang, jolting the both of them from their current position. They both pulled away in utter discomfiture and embarrassment. Mentally kicking herself for flushing so badly, Gaeul looked away to hide away her reddened cheeks while Yijung excused himself to pick up the call.

_Yah! It's not like you've kissed him!_ She scolded herself. _That's why it's the more embarrassing. Chu Gaeul, you fool!_

"Hello," he said, irritation was visible in his voice.

"Yo, Yijung ah." It was Woobin with his slightly over the top cheery voice. "Where are you?"

"Am I supposed to report myself to you now?" Yijung replied, praying that Woobin would figure out he was barging in on the wrong time.

"Yah, So Yijung. You're not off to some club with pretty ladies and forgotten all about me, are you?" Apparently, he didn't take the hint.

Exasperated, Yijung contemplated on hanging up on Woobin. "No, I'm not! Can we talk later?"

Woobin chuckled on the other end of the line. "Calm down. I'm actually calling you from Junpyo's place. We're holding up a get together for dinner plan. Geum Jandi told me to get you here."

"Oh." _Damn it_, Yijung thought. His head was brainstorming ways to get out of it.

"Uh-huh. And by the way, remember to take Gaeul yang along. Jandi insisted," Woobin said. A loud laughter followed soon after.

Yijung raised an eyebrow. "How did you-"

"Master," he said simply. "I believe you behaved yourself today?" Woobin teased.

Yijung snorted. "You sure know how to pick out your timing."

Woobin lightly shook his head, smiling to himself as he said, "A friendly reminder my bro, don't mess with Gaeul yang or you'll have to deal with Jandi."

"I'm not," Yijung said, almost in a whisper. "Anyway, I'm on my way. We'll be there in ten minutes," he said and hung up the phone.

"Something wrong?" Gaeul asked as he turned to face her once again.

"Not really. The others are inviting us for a dinner at Junpyo's place."

****

After the dinner, Jandi had pulled Gaeul aside for a one on one talk. Being Gaeul's over protective friend over the years, Jandi felt the need to warn her off Yijung, once again.

"Gaeul…" she stuttered. She wasn't even sure how to start on it. "You do know…that…uh…"

Gaeul frowned, trying to figure out the direction of Jandi's speech until she realized how Jandi's gaze occasionally reverted to Yijung.

"Jandi." Gaeul slowly took Jandi's hand in hers. "In case you didn't realize, I'm a big girl now. I'm no longer the weak Gaeul that cries for your help everytime a problem strike. It's the same reason for you to be holding onto Junpyo sunbae, I'm not going to give up on him. The path that I choose, I want to walk through it bravely, with no regret, because it's my choice. The road might be hard and obscure, but I think it's better to take a chance than pondering on the probability for the rest of my life."

"Gaeul ah..." Gaeul was right. The love she had for Yijung was undeniable. And maybe, just maybe, that Casanova…he could change for the better because of her. "Araso. I'm not going to ask you to give up on him again," Jandi said. "But! If he dares to hurt you in any way, I won't let him get away with it," Jandi insisted, showing off her fist.

Gaeul smiled. "Actually this is way too early for us to be discussing this. He's leaving soon," Gaeul muttered.

"Eh?" Jandi scowled.

Gaeul nodded and sighed. "He's going abroad, to Sweden."

Jandi was dumbfounded. _Gaeul ah…_

Gaeul's gaze fell on the floor as she reminisce Yijung's words. "Well, he promised that when he comes back I'd be the first person he'd look for. Do you think I can hold onto that promise?" Gaeul asked.

"It's a bold promise from a cold hearted womanizer," Jandi replied. "But I don't think Yijung sunbae is the kind of guy that'd make empty promises," she added. "For him to make such promise, he must be really serious about you."

Both girls broke into a smile, relieved and reassured that Yijung's words might be the start of something new and promising.

****

A week later…

Gaeul was cleaning up the place before leaving for the night. Jandi had suddenly disappeared earlier when she head out to throw the rubbish. Gaeul and master pretty much figured out that it might be Junpyo's doing. It was Jandi's graduation night after all.

"Gaeul, you can go home now. It's pretty late for you to be out and about," master called out from the kitchen.

"Araso," Gaeul replied as she took off her apron. "Are you sure you don't need help in there?" she offered.

"Nothing you can help me with here. Just go," he said.

Just when she was getting ready to leave, "Gaeul yang," a voice called out from her back, the all too familiar voice that sent shivers all over her body. She turned to see Yijung, as usual well dressed with his fancy suits and bow tie.

"Sunbae, what are you doing here?"

He greeted her with smile.

****

It was funny for a guy of his status to be sitting with her, a common girl, in a park with every passerby staring at them as they walked by. But she couldn't blame them. Yijung was, in her opinion…overdressed.

"Are you going to say it or keep me guessing?" she finally asked.

Yijung heaved a sigh. "It's tomorrow." Further explanation was unnecessary, she can pretty much figure it out.

_He's leaving. Period._

Gaeul smiled bitterly. "So, it finally came huh." It took her a moment to add, "I'm not going to be there. So I'm going to say my goodbye here."

Yijung can't hide his disappointment. "Oh."

"I don't think I'd be able to do it," she lamented, "watch you as you turn your back and leave. It's hard." Tears welled up in her eyes.

Yijung felt a pit in his stomach. "I'm planning on keeping my promise," he said, reminding her of his promise not too long ago. "Will you wait for me?" he asked.

"Should I?" she answered with yet another question.

Yijung clenched his hand in a fist. "Gaeul yang," he said, and she turned her head to look at him. This time, he didn't hesitate. He took the plunge and kissed her, right then. He thought she might shrivel and pulled away, but he guessed wrong. She kissed him back with a pent up passion they both know. Yijung put his arms around her waist as he sank deeply into her mesmerizing lips. Their heart was thumping so loud as the rhythm of the kiss intensified.

When the kiss ended, they were both struggling to catch their breath and tried to register what just happened. They both laughed. There were noticeable a few gasps escaped during the little drama that was going on.

That night, they weren't able to say anything or find a closure. Both were overwhelmed with the grasp that it was goodbye. No one can predict what the future hold. The uncertainty, the longing, the distance, they were both insecure. Yijung questioned himself if the journey was necessary, but he knew the answer to that, that was why he had made the choice.

****

Woobin, Junpyo and Jihoo took the turn to give Yijung a hug and wished him well for the trip. The atmosphere turned solemn.

"Yah, this isn't really goodbye. I'm going to return after 4 years," Yijung said. "And you guys can visit me whenever you get the chance," he added.

"Just take care of yourself, buddy." Junpyo patted his shoulder.

Yijung smiled. "You too. I hope everything goes well for you in America."

"It's a bit depressing to see F4 parting ways. I've always thought we'd all stick together til the end. I guess we needed to grow up too," Woobin said.

Yijung sighed. "I wasn't expecting sappy farewell guys," he said. "By the way, where's Geum Jandi?" Yijung asked, realizing her absent.

"Aish, that girl. She must be running late again. Doesn't she know my flight is an hour after yours?!" Junpyo complained.

The others chuckled lightly. In the meantime, the other three questioned on Gaeul's absent too. Despite their rather low profile relationship, everyone can pretty much guess something was going on between them. It was quite odd for her not to show up.

When Jandi came running towards them not long after that, Yijung's hope went downhill. _She didn't come after all._

"Geum Jandi, I'm touched. You came to sent me off?" Yijung joked.

Jandi took a moment to compose herself when she finally announced, "She's here!"

Yijung's eyes bulged. _Gaeul yang?_

And there she was, standing a few feet from him, sweat dripping off her forehead. "Sunbae," she said, catching her breath as she slowly walked towards him.

Yijung, unknowingly, walked towards her direction. The blissful look on his face was obvious. "You came," he said, not believing his eyes. _This might be a dream._

"I had too." was the answer. "I forgot to tell you something last night," she said.

Yijung's brow furrowed. "Huh?"

"I will wait for you." There was a strong confidence in her words. And that promise. She was putting her heart on the line. "4 years, 5 years…it doesn't matter. I'll be right here, waiting for you," she said with a smile.

Yijung pulled her into his arms, tightening his hold on her. Not a care in the world who might be watching, he just wanted to hold on her tight, to know and make sure that he wasn't dreaming, that this was real, she was real. "I'll come back," he promised. "And I promise you, when I'm back, it'd be for you."

****

Gaeul silently watched his plane took off, tears in her eyes, not of sadness but rather of hopefulness. The promise they shared, time would be the witness. This had been a surreal experience for her – getting to know him and falling in love with him.

_So Yijung, I'm glad I met you._

****


	10. Chapter Ten Pt 1: Distance

**Chapter ten [part one]: Distance**

Seoul, Korea

Gaeul gazed at her cellphone long enough to know she'd be disappointed. Again. It's been a month since he was gone. Silently, she left enraged, upset, melancholy, all at once. How can life be so normal when he left such a big empty space after his departure? It was as if the fairytale dreamland ended as soon as that plane took off. Gone was not only the love of her life. Also the reason to smile.

That arrogant Gu Junpyo, with his extreme protectiveness and concern for Jandi, almost suffocated her even when he was thousands of miles away. The phone calls. The short rude messages, yet so sweet Jandi would often smile to herself. How envy she was of Jandi.

Then again, what more could she asked for? A promise. That was all he was ready to give. She didn't even have the right to be angry of him. She knew she had promised to wait for him patiently, but she didn't know that waiting could feel so lonely.

The door of the porridge shop slowly opened and a dashing young man entered. A few men in black were tailing him closely behind, standing like a statue as to guard the door when the young man came in. "Gaeul yang," he called out.

She missed that – the door opened to the man she always seems to be least expected. "Sunbae." But it was not him.

He sensed it. She was missing him.

Flashback

"_How have you been?" Woobin asked. _

_Yijung had called for the first time after two weeks of settling into his college life in Sweden. "It's been crazy," he admitted. "I didn't think living alone abroad would be this difficult, but I'll manage." he lied._

"_I did what you told me to," Woobin said, changing the subject._

_Gaeul yang…_

_Yijung choked back the stifling tenseness. "How was she?"_

"_Why don't you call and ask her that yourself?" Woobin said. There was a pregnant pause before Woobin continued on, "Sometimes, words speak louder than action. What you're trying to do or prove, she can't see it nor feel it. Call her, so she'd at least feel self-assured."_

_Yijung lightly shook his head. "Not yet. Not until I come back as a different man. Someone who will be able to protect her. Someone who will be able to love her unconditionally. I promised I'll be back, for her."_

"_Sometimes I just don't get how your mind works. Would it kill you to just call her and say a simple hello? At least you guys would feel less miserable."_

_Yijung breathed out a sigh. "Call me a coward or whatever, I just…can't afford to hurt that person because of my incapability. When I return, I'd change that. Woobin, can't you just trust me just this once?"_

"_What about her? Don't you feel sorry for her? She missed you like crazy!"_

"_That is why I had you to look out for her."_

End of flashback

****

"I told you, I'm fine. You don't have to come and visit me everyday," Gaeul insisted.

"I'm just fulfilling a promise to my brother," he answered simply.

"Eh?"

"You may think he doesn't care, but it isn't so. He does care," he said, trying to confirm her of something they both knew so well. "The day before he left, he asked me for a favor, for the first time."

Her questioning eyes never left him.

"To take care of you while he was gone," he told her. "That was his way of showing his feelings." Then he added, "he might be a cold-hearted womanizer, but he's a pure childlike when it comes to love, totally clueless and timid. And he doesn't do well with self expressing and words."

"Why are you telling me all this?" she asked.

"Because I feel the need to let you know…of how he feels for you."

Gaeul was smiling weakly. "I know. That's why I promised to wait for him."

"Good," he said, clapping his hands. "From now on, Chu Gaeul, considered yourself to be real lucky. The famous Prince Song would be your bodyguard," he declared, "today onwards."

"Bodyguard?" she ridiculed.

"Yep." He nodded enthusiastically. "4 years is really long! I need to guard you from all those hungry wolves out there til Yijung comes back," he joked.

Gaeul chuckled. "Sunbae."

****

Stockholm, Sweden

_Could it be? It can't possibly be her?! What would she be doing here anyway? _

Involuntarily, his feet carried him forward as he walked through the crowd to get to her. The red coat, the long black hair, the petite figure, it was all unmistakably familiar. This couldn't possibly some cruel joke, was it? He had been praying to see that image again for so long. It turned out time went by really slow when you're missing someone. He felt that strange surge of emotion for the first time.

His hand was shaking when he touched her shoulder and muttered the words. "Gaeul yang."

****


	11. Chapter Ten Pt 2: It’s been a while

**Chapter ten [part two]: It's been a while**

5 months later…

Seoul, Korea

Woobin pulled up the luxurious yellow sports car at the main entrance of Seouldae (Seoul National University). It was Gaeul's first day in college. He can sense her nervousness from the way her body fidgeted. He didn't do it on purpose, but after six months of getting to know her, he can't help but to notice and became more attentive to her every move, body language and face expression.

Gaeul's heart leaped into her mouth, her shoulder tensed and she went still. _God, this is it. _

Woobin chuckled at the sight of Gaeul's pale face. "Should I escort you in?" he offered.

"N-no…" she stammered. "I'll be fine on my own," she muttered, unconvinced.

"Then why are you're face as white as ghost?" he teased, focusing his attention on her flushed cheeks.

"No, I'm not," she lied, cupping both her cheeks.

It was not of fear or anxiety, rather the feeling of stumped and dismal. This was her big day and she had hoped for at least a word of encouragement from him, or a simple text message will do. She can't believe after all this time Yijung still hasn't tried to contact her. Sometimes, she wondered if it all had been a dream, fantasy that she created – the kiss, the embrace, the promise. But Woobin presence made her feel the otherwise. The only prove to the magical moments.

Gaeul looked down on her hands. "Sunbae…would you think I'm selfish for wishing him to be here?" she asked. "For the past few months I kept on thinking, I don't mind if he doesn't change. No, he shouldn't change at all, he should have just stay. His hands…his talent…he can recover here, and I'll be by his side all the way. If only he's here."

Woobin winced and tore his gaze away from her, trying to put his guilty conscience to the back of his head. _Keep your mouth shut, Song Woobin! _

"Or maybe I was panicking. 4 years is really long, and there'd definitely be a lot of pretty girls there. And to add up his Casanova nature," she complained. "I wonder how he's doing there?"

Woobin had to bite his lips from blurting it out. "Gaeul, I'm probably not in the position to say this, but have faith in him," he said solemnly.

****

"Yah, Chu Gaeul! That couldn't possibly be your boyfriend, is it?" Lee Yeonhee said, slapping Gaeul's shoulder to get hold of her attention. Yeonhee was in awe by the pretty boy who waved and smiled at their direction.

"Aish…" Gaeul grumbled, rubbing her pained shoulder and looked over.

_Sunbae…_

He leisurely walked towards her, a gracious smile fixed on his face. Gaeul had to look up to meet his eyes. "I told you, you don't have to come and pick me up."

"And I told you, I'm the bodyguard. It's my job," he insisted.

Yeonhee unconsciously gaped at him. _Wah, there is such thing as Prince Charming_, she thought.

Suddenly it dawned on her, "Omona (Oh my God)! You're Song Woobin?! The famous F4 Song Woobin?" she cried out, her finger pointing on him and raised a few stares from the passerby.

Woobin squirmed at the attention and mumbled, "Gaeul, let's go." Taking one of her hand as he led her to his car. Gaeul, being helplessly dragged by Woobin, waved at Yeonhee and bid her goodbye.

"Gaeul, who is that freak?" he asked, as soon as they were both seated in the car.

"Don't be so rude! She's not a freak. She was just surprised to see one of the infamous F4 members," she pouted.

"She better not be some sort of a stalker," he joked. "Well, I guess my charm is just inevitable."

Gaeul rolled her eyes and responded with a "Tch…"

If someone told her six months ago that Song Woobin would be her some kind of best friend in the near future, she'd probably laugh at them in the face. She barely spoken to him, let alone be a close friend of him? What a joke. But now, the idea of them being friend was not so outrageous after all. It was hard for her to define their friendship but Woobin had been more than just friend over the few months.

****

Stockholm, Sweden

"Oppa!" someone called out. "So Yijung!" she exclaimed when he didn't respond.

Yijung turned to his back to see Park Shinhye running towards him, panting to catch her breath as she drew to a halt in front of him.

"What's wrong?" he asked. His eyes on the petite figure standing two feet away from him, the one girl that had been his once-upon-a-time nemesis.

She waved her hands in respond, motioning hand signals that he could not fathom.

"What?!" he repeated, getting more impatient.

"You have a guest!" she finally blurted out.

_A guest?_ he thought.

"In the cafeteria," she added soon after.

A person came to his mind and Yijung rushed off in a heartbeat.

****

A warm gentle smile greeted him, with a pair of soft yielding eyes that used to melt his heart like butter in the afternoon sun.

"Cha Eunjae," he muttered under his breath.

"Annyeong," she said. "How you've been?"

After a moment of polite greetings, they both sat face to face, sipping their coffee in a strange quiet calmness, waiting for the moment to break off the awkwardness.

"Disappointed?" she asked, half joking.

"Ani (no)," he lied, "why would I?"

She shook her head in amusement. "Tch…After all this year, I can finally see that you were not such a hard problem to figure out after all," she teased.

"Yah…" he sighed. "What are you doing here?" he changed the subject instead.

"Oh…I came for the international ceramics exhibition at the local art centre tomorrow," she explained. "Ilhyun was going to come with me but he had something to take care of, so he'll arrive later in the evening," she added.

"Ah…" he said, nodded. He didn't quite understand though. Despite Eunjae's love for pottery, she never showed any interest in art exhibition before.

"Actually, the exhibition was just an excuse," she said, as if she was reading his mind. Their eyes met. "I just need to get away from Korea for a short while," she admitted.

"Something wrong?" Even though they weren't meant to be, he still cared for her as an old friend.

"Mmm," she nodded, "it didn't go well…the meeting with both parents."

Yijung took the hint. "It's my parents again, is it?"

She hesitated for a while. "Ilhyun had a fight with them," she finally revealed. "And my parents were quite upset with the incident and refused to have another meeting. It was so intense that I had to get away from it."

"How is hyung taking it in?" he asked.

"Not good. Without both parents' blessings, it's going to be hard," she said. "He didn't plan on telling them but my parents had insisted on it."

"Don't worry, I'll talk to them later," Yijung stated. "I'm not sure if it'd make a difference but..."

"Don't!" she cut him off. "Ilhyun and I, we're going to work through this together, it's our battle to fight anyway."

Yijung didn't prod, and heaved a sigh in respond.

"Actually, I didn't come to discuss about that, but rather the mess that you created back home," she said with a smile.

Yijung's eyes widened in surprise. "Eh?"

"Why didn't you try to contact her even once?" she asked. "And I thought you were sick of the hide and seek game."

_Gaeul yang…_

"So, you guys are best friends now?" He didn't mean to sound so offensive. "Cha Eunjae, stop sticking your nose into my business, I'm not a kid anymore." He regretted those words almost as soon as after he said it.

"That is why you need to grow up. Are you going to be like this forever? Stop running away and make up excuses to cover it up," she retorted.

He squinted at her, utterly stunned. "Yah…"

"Listen, Yijung ah. You left her with a vague promise, and you didn't even bother to find out how she was doing after that. A girl's heart is the most vulnerable when she's in love." Eunjae knew it better, she spoke from experience after all. "How do you expect her to hold onto you if you're not even making an effort?"

****

Unbeknownst to the two of them, someone was watching them from a near distance. Straining her neck to eavesdrop on their conversation, but her effort was fruitless as she only managed to hurt her neck in the process.

****

Seoul, Korea

Her cellphone rang, indicating a received text message. She flipped it open after a while, and her eyes bulged in a pleasant surprise.

"It's been a while," said the text message.


	12. Chapter Ten Pt 3: The boy and the girl

**Chapter ten [part three]: The boy and the girl**

Flashback

"_I thought I was going to stay beside you forever. Eversince we were a little kids, I've always believed that. Even when you'd hurt me, even when you'd flirt around other girls in front of me, I'd convince myself it's okay, you're going to be by my side in the end so it'd be okay," she said, remembering all those nights she spent waiting for him in his studio, when he'd come back with girls around his arms and she'd ended up going home, alone and feeling dejected. "It was childish, I know. I wanted so much for my love to be true, so I held everything in. But I was wrong Yijung ah, it was not okay. It hurt so much that I blame myself. For waiting." The tone of her voice was so soft and gentle it felt like she was singing a sad mellow tune, and he can't help but to feel her once upon heartache. "Maybe it was my fault…it must have been…I should have said something. I should have done something. But I choose to wait. That is why..." she couldn't finish her sentence._

"_Eunjae ah…"_

_She cut him off, "Don't do it again. Don't make her wait too long. Waiting for the one you love, do you know how lonesome that feels like?"_

End of flashback

****

Yijung: How have you been?

Gaeul: Sunbae, did you texted the wrong number?

Yijung : Mwoh (what)? What are you talking about, Gaeul yang?

Gaeul: Ani (no). It's just that…a message from you out of the blue. I thought you might have gotten the wrong number.

He texted a respond real quickly and hesitated soon after. _'I missed you.'_ He looked at those words for the longest time before he deleted and replaced them.

Yijung: I'm sorry it took me a while.

Gaeul: Don't be. I'm still glad that you texted me.

****

He owed it to her, he knows. There was no word to describe what kind of bond or effect she had on him, but she'd always be his scruples, the one that constantly reminding him of how short and fragile life can be, and how easily you can lost that special someone. He knew she moved on. They both did. But the history never failed to repeat, and they're both learning from the past.

****

"Woobin sunbae!" she exclaimed as soon as the call got through. Her voice was a tinge of clogged nasal and deafening chirpy. "Sunbae!" she cried out again.

"Hey, what's up?" She sounded genuinely ecstatic over the phone that he can't help but to smile, even when he's totally clueless to the reason behind her contentment.

She kept fanning herself, tears of joy in her eyes. A mixed emotion of dazed, cloud nine, disbelief and astonished. "He texted me!" she announced. It was so random, unpredictable and so uncommon that she felt almost skeptical.

His jaws literally dropped. He should be happy, this was a great news. Nevertheless Woobin felt his heart dropped. There was no rhyme or reason to it, he was simply astounded. "That's…great," he finally muttered.

"I know! I thought I was dreaming, but when I pinched hard on my arm, I can feel the sweet pain and know that it's real," she sobbed. "I am so happy that I feel a little guilty."

"Why?"

"Because I don't think I deserve this," she responded. "I don't think I deserve to be this happy. I don't dare to hope, it's too good to be true."

Woobin smiled sourly. "Are you that happy?"

"Oh…so happy that I fear my heart was going to burst."

****

"Oppa, do you have a girlfriend? No, not just a girlfriend, but a very important person," she interrupted him. She knew perfectly well the answer to that question, but she needed to hear it from him.

"Don't you think you're being a little nosy, missy?" he said, not averting his attention from the pottery wheel and the clay on his hands.

"Come on, tell me," she plead. "Gaeul yang…is that her name?" she added.

Flashback

_Gaeul: There is a girl that really loves a boy, and often wonders if he feels the same. When he leaves for another country, they made a promise. She waited, and waited for months. There was no news about the boy. The girl was panic stricken. There were times when the girl feels like giving up. There were times when the girl feels insecure. There were times when the girl will cry in solitude. She feared the boy might have forgotten all about her and his promise, because the girl really misses the boy._

_Yijung: So is the boy. And he feels the same way._

End of flashback

He had a faraway look on his face and a smile curved up on his lips, which indicated the significance of the girl. A surge of jealousy crept up on her side.

"What kind of a girl is she?" she asked again. "That Gaeul yang."

"The kind that I really dislike," he responded soon after. He didn't elaborate nor explained it. Only a broad smile intact.

****

A year later…

"Happy birthday!" Woobin exclaimed.

_Flashback_

"_Happy birthday, Gaeul yang," the deep voice greeted her. A box of birthday cake was visible on his hand._

"_Eh?" Birthday? she thought._

End of flashback

A year ago, Yijung had gotten the date wrongly but they celebrated it nonetheless. It was weird and awkward, to have eaten a birthday cake when it was not really her birthday and they barely knew each other at that time, but the cake never tasted sweeter than that.

It was a sense of déjà vu seeing Woobin standing there holding up the cake box. The all-too-familiar scene, except the person changed. She should have guessed this, master's sudden departure, leaving her the keys to the shop. She even wondered for a second there how she'd close up the shop on her own. But Woobin's presence made her felt more relaxed. He had that kind of effect on her – peaceful and soothing, practically like an old comforter that makes you fall asleep within seconds.

"So, tell me. What kind of a girl do you like, sunbae?" she randomly questioned as she shoved a spoonful of cake into her mouth.

A wicked grin turned up on his face. "Sexy body like Lee Hyori, pretty legs like Ha Jiwon and extreme beauty like Kim Taehee!" he exclaimed. "And oh oh…preferably an experienced older woman," he added with a chuckle.

"Mwoh (what)?" She narrowed her eyes. "Then again…you're Woobin sunbae, it's your nature to have a taste like that," she mocked.

He held his hand to his heart and faked a hurtful look. "Wah~ What a spiteful comment…you really hurt me there, Gaeul," he joked. "Am I really that kind of a guy, to you?"

Gaeul shook her head slightly. "I don't know. I don't really see you that way, but you just give out this weird vibe sometimes, it's hard to really figure you out," she said with a laugh. "Why older women though?"

Woobin shrugged. "Because love is a mind game, and older women handle it better. They know the game rules so they won't get attached or linger when the feeling is all gone," he said like a total pro.

Gaeul scorned. "Sunbae…"

"What?"

"Do you want me to introduce really nice, beautiful girls to you?" she offered.

Woobin almost choked on his cake. Gaeul quickly patted him on the back while he drank a whole glass of water to clear down his throat. "Oh God, please don't," he finally said. "That campus friend of yours, what's her name? Lee…Yeonhee? She's like a nightmare!" he exaggerated. "…keeps following me around whenever I came to pick you up. God, she was killing me with all those paparazzi-like questions. And you wondered why I never go around your campus anymore?"

It was not a total lie. Apart from avoiding Yeonhee, he was avoiding another person or rather the strange rise of emotion he had for her. It was a little intimidating because she was not just a girl, she's Gaeul yang, Yijung's Gaeul yang.

Gaeul burst into laughter and came to an abrupt halt when the sound of her cellphone interjected. It was a text message. She cracked up a smile, so radiant and glowing, it was blinding him, who was seated directly opposite her.

****


	13. Chapter Ten Pt 4: Love rivals?

**Chapter ten [part four]: Love rivals?**

"It's pathetic, isn't it?" she asked, leaning a bit to toy with the strawberry on the cake. "Whenever I'm being questioned on the boyfriend topic, I can't seem to give a precise answer. I can't put my finger on what relationship I have with Yijung sunbae…there's no name to it. Neither can I define it," she said solemnly. The mood turned somber and she stared dully on her birthday cake. "It's ambiguity, right then right now."

Woobin wished to be anywhere but here, to see and hear her moped about Yijung, it was wearing him down. He hated his role as Yijung's best friend and Gaeul's guardian. Because of these roles, it prevented him from having any sort of romantic feelings for her. No, he shouldn't even bear such thought to begin with. Song Woobin, he doesn't have a right to love, or to be loved. He doesn't deserve to be in the spotlight, regardless of his status as one of the member of F4. At least, that's what he always believed in. To stand one step behind F4, to take care of them, to prevent them from getting hurt and to not burden the F4 have always been his dogma in life.

"Yah, Chu Gaeul. Didn't he just texted you, shouldn't you be in a happy mode? What a mood swing you have here, think I need to warn Yijung off when he comes back," he said, half jokingly.

Gaeul scoffed. "Sunbae…"

"Komaya (kid)," he started to say, lightly knocking her on the head. "I'm getting tired of repeating this, so I'm just going to say this once more. I know that guy, I grew up with him. What do you think I'd be doing here if it weren't for him? There might not be a name to this relationship, but there's a special place for you in his heart, of that I'm sure. And you're really a special girl, Gaeul yang."

His last sentence caught her off guard, and their eyes locked on each other for a split moment. Gaeul's heartbeat went up a notch. "Don't fall for me," she blurted out in the spur of the moment.

Woobin's expression turned from dropped jaws to awkward cough to a quick laugh. "Do you know how funny you are?" he said. "If you're five years older, it might be a different case," he added. Woobin knew it in his heart, that with or without five years age difference, he was already falling hard for this girl.

Gaeul heaved a relief sigh and chuckled a bit at her own stupidity. "Sunbae, have you ever been in love before? I mean really in love with a girl. And do you believe in soul mate?"

Woobin smiled faintly. "True love or soul mate…I'm not meant for those things," he said quietly, taking a sip of his soda.

Gaeul's brows furrowed in curiosity. "Why not?"

Woobin shook his head and faked a smile. "Just because."

****

Where should he begin? The reason why he had been the protector of F4 over the years? The reason as to why he can't take a relationship seriously? Or the reason why he chose to neglect himself and to put the others above his priority?

Woobin recalled vividly a boy from the past that haunted his dreams for years. A boy who had been his rocks and protector, that guarded him from any danger that lies ahead, even when he was a child himself. The loud thud of the gun fire sound still rang in Woobin's ears from time to time. Having witnessed his own flesh and blood being brutally slaughtered in exchange for his life, it was then Woobin realized that he was not just an ordinary kid. As a child that was born into the Song family, he has a great responsibility rest upon his shoulder. And his poor older brother's life had been the price paid for the painful lesson.

Into his adolescence, another incident related to the Song family almost cost him the life of his best friends, whom he considered as brothers. Kidnapped and tortured due to their association to the heir of the Song family, the traumatic experience had been one of Woobin's deepest apologies towards his friends. So embarrassed and apologetic that he couldn't even bring himself to look at them in the eyes sometimes.

And it didn't stop right there. He even lost the one woman he cared the most just when he thought he might have a shot in happiness. Would that be enough reason for him to avoid love at all costs? Or should he just admit the fact that being born into the Song family made him a cursed man. He shall never feel love. Yes, that was his destiny and he began to accept it years ago when Sunye died. But Gaeul's presence made his lifeless heart beat again, in a way he vowed no one ever would be able to.

And what could be said about Sunye? The sweet innocent girl, who had her whole life ahead of her, died before she even had a chance to live life. Woobin would never forgive himself for that. Never.

Flashback

_"Oppa, guess what this is?" she asked, her hand holding out a tiny box which could very well contain a ring._

"You're not proposing me, are you?" he teased. "Yah, I was expecting a grand proposal, coming from the renowned beauty of Min family."

"Tch…" she scorned. "Oppa, get a hold of yourself. It's nothing like what you think it is."

Woobin took the box from her hand and revealed the content. It was an impressive ten carat diamond ring that shone as bright as the sun. "Ring?" he ridiculed with the statement she just made.

"Oh, can you believe I just got proposed to?" she said and took the seat beside him, missing out his shocked face expression at the mention of the news. "And I just turned 18? Appa said that it's about time for me to get married and plan ahead. And appa suggested that he's the right guy for me." It appears that she wasn't too happy with it too. "Planned marriage, how silly is that? Old fashioned and traditional, it's not how I choose my life to be."

"Who is he?" Woobin interrupted.

"He's name is Choi Siwon, the successor to the Choi Group. A twenty years old brilliant business man and one of the top ten hot shot billionaires at the moment. Appa looked up to him, apparently he's a really amazing guy. We met earlier and he didn't seem so bad. He just doesn't talk much and he left too soon for a business meeting. And the way he proposed was so stiff and gauche…"

Woobin wasn't listening to half of the details. His gaze was fixed on the ring instead. Sunye, he had met her on one of his Kendo classes. She was this amazing petite girl that unexpectedly able to make him fall to his knees on their first match. Captivated by her skills and wits, Woobin grew fond of her and they became inseparable soon after. He always thought of her as a younger sister that he needed to protect, much like his F4 brothers. But today, the idea of someone proposing to Sunye was quite alarming. It wasn't as interesting as he thought it would be when she'd finally found the man of her life.

"I'm not going to marry anyone else but you, oppa," she suddenly announced.

Woobin's eyes widened in surprise. "Sunye."

"I…made up my mind about who I'm going to spend the rest of my life with a while ago," she said. "When I met you, oppa," she added with a smile. "That's why oppa, before I'm turning into a real woman, you can't fall for anyone else. No matter how great she might be. Got it?" she continued in a serious tone.

"Don't do this," he responded. "You're like a sister to me."

"We're going to change that," she said confidently.

End of flashback

It was the last he had heard from her.

Woobin gazed longingly into the picture of the girl in his wallet. She was wearing her usual bright smile that cut through his heart like a sharp blade. "Don't worry, I'm not falling for her." It was a lie. "She's Yijung's girl, I know that. You know I'd die before I'd even try to cross that line."

****

"Ah~" she shrieked.

The lights in the lift went out and they were enveloped in a total darkness. Shinhye hold onto the person beside her as hard as she could and shut her eyes close. She hated dark, always have been. The familiar scene brought painful memories to her.

Yijung cringed. Shinhye's claw on him stung him a bit, but he could felt her shaking vigorously. "Yah, are you okay?" he asked, concerned. He took out his cellphone to try to light the place with it and saw that Shinhye had broken into sweats. He put his hand onto hers in effort to calm her down, but Shinhye's knees buckled and she fell onto the floor.

"Shinhye ah!" he almost cried out.

"My legs are numb…" she said. "I can't move them." She stifled her sob.

He sat with her on the floor. "It's okay," he comforted her, placing one of his hands on her shoulder.

They sat together on the floor for nearly an hour before she finally spoke. "Oppa, did you know that when you first came, you were the biggest sensation that everyone wants a piece of in the campus? The reportedly to be a pottery genius from a distinguished artistic descent, whom own a huge art museum in Korea. You are quite a catch among the ladies," she said with a weak smile. "I saw you the day that you arrived and I thought, 'Here comes another spoiled brat who thinks so highly of himself'," she added.

Yijung chuckled. "Is that why you gave me the hard time when we first met?" he asked.

"That and the fact that I thought you were messing around with my friends," she admitted. "It wasn't until much later that I learned that you didn't. There I was, thinking that you tried to make a move on me after toying with my friends. And the fact that you were the rumored womanizer didn't help a bit to clarify the situation," she explained. "But the Yijung oppa that I've come to know is nothing like what they've claimed him to be."

Yijung sighed. "That's because you haven't meet that part of him," he said. "But I don't plan on letting him back into my life. He's in the past and will stay that way for good."

"Because of that person?" she asked inaudibly.

Flashback

_"Gaeul yang," he called out and touched the girl's shoulder lightly. His face fell and his smile faded as soon as she turned around. She was a gorgeous girl that resembled Gaeul in a lot of ways, but she was not her. Yijung felt his disappointment and gave slight a nod. The girl looked every bit like a Korean girl, but he couldn't be sure. "I'm sorry. I thought you were someone I know," he explained politely in English._  
End of flashback

Gaeul? Autumn? He's a Korean, she thought.

The girl scoffed in exasperation. "Don't you think your lines are a bit off and lame? Even that good looks can't get you by," she cynically replied in Korean.

A bit thrown off, Yijung managed a respond. "Excuse me?" Oh, so the goddess is indeed a Korean and a rude one at that too, he thought.

They shared a grudgingly fired up look before Yijung took a step backward to leave. He wasn't going to create a scene here in public. Especially not with a girl.

"Hey!" she started to call out. When he didn't respond to that, she continued, "And what kind of a lame name is Gaeul? Couldn't you've come up with a better name before you came and make a fool of yourself? Tch…"

Yijung turned to his back with a whole new aggravated look. "Listen," he started to say, "I don't care what you want to say or think about me, but I'd expect at least a bit of respect on my friend's name. She has done nothing to deserve your rude mockery and insult!"

Shinhye was speechless when Yijung finished off his speech and stormed off in annoyance.

****


	14. Chapter Ten Pt 5: Homecoming

**Chapter ten [part five]: Homecoming**

3 years later

Woobin strolled around the space, watching the photographs of four smiling boys on the wall staring back at him. Images of bygone times spent with F4 in that place made him felt an overpowering distant. In the past, he'd always be there hearing out everyone's dilemma and giving out advices. Being the good listener in the group, he felt an obligation to look out for the others, and he fit that brotherly role over the years they've been together. Now that they're on different paths on becoming successful man, Woobin can't help but to feel his presence was no longer needed. With Junpyo and Yijung abroad, Jihoo preoccupied in his medical study, he was left all alone here. The frustration got into him sometimes that he can barely breathe.

But the thought of them coming home made him felt more relaxed. Junpyo, who wouldn't have guess what plan he had set up for Jandi? She was all that he had talked about on their phone calls and video conferences. Jihoo, now that he's graduating soon, might be more engaged to his job. As for Yijung, his homecoming might be the greatest news of all, because it'd bring a smile to Gaeul. Woobin didn't miss the gleam in her eyes everytime Yijung was mentioned.

****

Excitedly, Gaeul turned the door knob and slowly opened the door to reveal a completely furnished apartment with all her belongings placed accordingly. Her jaws dropped as she scanned through the whole place. From the lavish sofa and television set in the living room, to the pinkish medium size bed and clothing wardrobe in her room, to the perfect kitchen and flower scented bathroom, everything was perfect.

Moving out and living on her own has been Gaeul's first step into embracing adulthood. After graduated from college, she worked hard in preparing for working challenges. She wanted to be able to stand on her own two feet and be an independent woman that she always dreamt of. To improve both physically and mentally, present the new mature side of her and flaunt her womanly essence, Gaeul wished she can do all that before Yijung's homecoming.

Fortunately, the rent was affordable, thanks to a certain someone. Gaeul had planned on getting a small room in the centre of the city, with good location and a cheap rent. But Woobin had insisted that she moved in here instead. Given that he owned the place and offered a much cheaper rent than anywhere else she had looked for, Gaeul reluctantly accepted his offer. Gaeul was well aware of her tight budget and she can't really afford the freedom that she seeks without his help. Gaeul felt a sense of bittersweet gratitude, and undeserving of his expenses for her.

Nonetheless, the friendship that grew within the 4 years span has caused a misinterpretation on Gaeul parents' part. They clearly believed that something was up between her and Woobin, even when she repeatedly insisted that they were just friend. And to remember how they had invited him over for dinner and interrogate him relentlessly the last time, Gaeul cringed every time.

Flashback

"_So, you're the heir of the Song's Construction Enterprise? How old are you now? Are you the CEO of the company at the moment?" Gaeul's father bombarded Woobin with so many questions within minutes after the introduction._

_Woobin smiled awkwardly in return, and show a beaten look at Gaeul._

'_Sorry, sunbae', she silently signaled him. "Appa, cheh bal (please)." Gaeul pouted. This is embarrassing!_

"_Be quiet," her father said in respond._

_Woobin was clearly trying his best to be polite and be a good sport about it, since he responded to Gaeul father's every query. "I am. I'm 25. And no, I'm only the general manager at the moment."_

"_Oh," her father nodded slightly. "So, what is your relationship with my daughter?" he added with a straight face. No point in beating around the bush, right?_

_To which Gaeul responded with a whine, "Appa!" When her father shooed her, Gaeul scoffed in exasperation._

_Woobin let out a soft chuckle before he replied simply, "I'm her bodyguard." When Woobin didn't add anything to his last respond, the room was silent for a split moment before both men burst into laughter._

End of flashback

Now that she's moving out, they won't be seeing much of Woobin anymore, Gaeul had opted to use this opportunity to banish the misunderstanding altogether. They need to get their fact straight before Yijung comes home. However, explaining about Yijung would create another headache for Gaeul, in which she wasn't prepared at the moment.

"So, what do you think of the place?" a deep voice greeted her from the back.

Gaeul turned around and took a glance at the tall and strong figure that has been her protector over the years. "Sunbae." She welcomed him with a smile.

"Do you like it?" he asked again.

She only managed a pleased nod. "This is just too much, sunbae. I have received so much from you and I barely give anything for you in return. I've become more and more in debt with you," she admitted.

"I'm not doing all this to get something in return," he said.

"I know, but still," she protested.

"Relax. I'd let you know how you can repay me in the future, after I figured it out, okay? How does that sound?" he suggested.

"Good. Even if you want me to be your bodyguard in return, I'd agree to it," she responded.

The conversation was interrupted when Gaeul's cellphone rang. Her forehead was deeply wrinkled as she quietly spoke to the person from the other end of the line. Almost as soon as she hung up the phone, a big grin was plastered on her face, "I just got a call from the kindergarten. I got the job!" she stated ecstatically.

"What? Seriously?" he started to say. When Gaeul narrowed her eyes at him, Woobin retreat his joking plan and threw up him hands in defeat, "Okay, I won't say anything."

"Could this day be any better?" When she realized his eyes never left her, she shot him a questioning look. "What's wrong?"

Woobin took a deep breath before laying it out to her. "You know he's coming home soon, right? How do you feel about that?"

Gaeul was dazed, caught off guard by the question. "Scared," she said, owning up to the fear she felt inside. "Truthfully, I waited so long for this day to come, and finally when it's drawing near, I think I'm having cold feet. Even though we have kept in contact for the past 4 years, I can't help but to fear if he might have a change of heart. In the same time, I'm excited to meet him again. I missed him to a point that I can barely contain myself. I just hope he'd come home soon."

****

Yijung walked slowly through the crowd trying to find something, yet nothing in particular. He has been feeling lightheaded these days, giddy to the realization that he's going home soon. His flight to Korea has been scheduled for next week and he couldn't contain his excitement. The first person he had promised to look for, he wished to get something nice for her, but not something extravagant that'd cause alarm.

"Oppa!" she called out and rushed towards him until she caught up with his pace. "What are you doing here?" Shinhye asked after she managed to catch her breath.

Yijung shrugged. "Looking around," he said simply.

"Aiye, you're looking for a gift for her, aren't you?" she said.

"There you go again. Stop being so nosy, missy," he said, not slowing down his pace. In fact, he was getting distracted as they approached a stall where a set of ruby ring caught his attention.

"Beautiful, isn't it?" the old lady said when Yijung clearly focused his gaze on the ring. "It is said to bring good fortune to lovers that wear it," she continued on.

"I don't believe in myth," Yijung responded.

"I see." The old lady gave him a warm smile. "Do you believe in love?"

Yijung's eyes met hers. "What if I do?"

"Then you do believe in myth," she said, offering no further explanation.

Yijung's lips curved up a smile. "I want this set then." It was crazy, a spur of the moment, he wasn't even sure if it was her size but he had a good feel about it.

The walk home was quiet. Yijung didn't pay much attention to anything but the ring for the whole time. It seems like he was in his own world where no one else exists but the ring.

"Oppa, you must be real excited to be going home soon," she broke off his trance.

"Oh, mm…" he silently nodded.

"I really wonder how she looks like. That dream girl of yours. I imagine her to be an angel-like person." she went on. "Oppa, how would you describe her in your eyes?"

Yijung was quiet for a while before he finally responded. "She's the kind of person that makes me want to live my life diligently. Like a breath of fresh air, she makes me feel and think in a way I've never before," he said. _The kind of girl I want to spend the rest of my life with_, he thought to himself.

"I wonder if she knows how important she is to you."

"She will. Soon enough." A content smile spread across his face.

****

Yijung had purposely avoided texting or calling her for the past few days. He was afraid that he might in any way hint his homecoming and thus ruined all the surprise. Even though it was a public knowledge that he'd back to Korea soon, he wanted to keep the date a secret. He wanted to see the look of surprise on her face when he dropped by. He had the day planned ahead by getting the information of her schedule for the day from Woobin.

He glanced nervously on the boarding plane board list, his plane will take off in about an hour. He took out the small box in his jacket once again and gazed intently on the ring. His thought turned to the conversation he had with Shinhye earlier before he came to the airport.

Flashback

"_I like you, always have been for the past 4 years," she confessed, opening her heart to him on their last goodbye. "I know how much you love her, but I still like you. No, I like you more for that."_

"_Shinhye ah," he tried to say._

"_I don't want you to feel any pressure. I'm not telling you this hoping that you'd fall for me. I just don't feel like having regrets in my life. If only I had met you sooner," she said. _

"_It won't change anything," he responded. "That girl, I wished her to be the first person I lay my eyes on every morning. I wished her to be the woman that laughs with me even when we're grey haired by then. And I wished for her to be the mother of my children. I don't think I'd be able to admit this to her personally, but I want my future to be filled with her," he quietly said._

_Shinhye forced a smile, her tears threatened to fall down her cheeks. "I know. Go home and live a happy life with her, oppa."_

"_I'm sorry."_

"_Don't be. As long as you're happy with her," she lied, a stab of pain surmounted her heart._

End of flashback

****

Shinhye watched from afar as his plane took off from the lane. It was like watching a piece of her leaving. Emptiness that had once overthrown her heart was eating her inside, again.

"You have to be happy. You have to…" she muttered through her sobs.

****

"Sunbae!" Gaeul said to the phone.

"Oh, I'm in the airport right now. I'll be home in a few hours," he mumbled through the phone, and stretched his sore body.

"Tired?" she asked.

"Mm…I was planning on going home in a day or two but Junpyo had insisted that I come home today. I guess something is up between him and Jandi. I bet he'd announce their engagement by tonight," he said with a smile.

"I know what you mean. I saw his interview when I was on my way to work earlier. I'm so jealous…"

Woobin chuckled. "You'd get your turn soon," he said in respond.

She scoffed. "Sunbae…stop teasing me."

"Araso. Just brace yourself, he's coming home any day now."

"You're talking as if I'm going to war or something."

"Well, just a reminder madam."

"Hey, stop calling me that."

"Yes madam," he joked. "By the way, I have to go now. Talk to you later, I'm hanging up."

****


	15. Chapter Eleven: The meeting

**Chapter eleven: The meeting**

As soon as the plane landed, Yijung felt a pit on his stomach. The moment he had long awaited has finally come. He was going to meet her. His heart was pounding so hard he feared people would be able to hear his heartbeat. But his face was a mask of stoic, his cool appearance in tact, with the shade covering his eyes, he seemed unapproachable and unreadable.

Mr. Jung, Yijung's family chauffeur for over twenty years, was waiting patiently for his young master at the arrival gate. When Yijung appeared at the gate, he hurried over to him and gave a little bow, "Welcome home, doryeonnim (young master)."

Surprised, Yijung nodded courteously nonetheless. "Did you come to drop off my car?" he asked.

Mr. Jung looked at his young master in puzzlement. "Animida (no), doryeonnim," he said apologetically, "I was not made aware that you request for your car. I was only told by manim (madam) to take you home."

Yijung nodded his understanding and sighed. Even after being away for years, his mother was still as persistent as ever. He already informed her in advance that he won't be home until he has tend to his affair on hand, but she has insisted that he come straight home. And it appeared she was planning to 'make' him come home.

"It's okay then. Can you drop me off to a place first?" he told the old man as he handed over the suitcase on his hand.

Mr. Jung hesitated for a second before saying, "Yes, doryeonnim."

****

Slowly walking down the corridor, Yijung heard a woman's voice interacting with little kids and sneak a peek at the owner of the angelic voice. In her, he saw the girl that had once scolded him for living his life so recklessly, the girl that had woken him up from his self-destructing act, the girl that has changed him for the better. No, not a girl anymore, but a woman now. She seemed like she changed so much, yet so familiarly the same.

"Is that a grape?" she marveled to Yun, the little boy that sat next to her, her own hands shaping the clay at the same time.

Yijung was standing at the door to witness it all. He realized how much he had missed her for the past 4 years. "There's still much pressure on your hands," he said and startled her.

"Yijung sunbae!" Her heart dropped. She stood up so abruptly her chair almost fell off. Even the kids noticed and whispered among themselves, questioning who the man in the leather jacket could be. He looked so striking and poised, like a prince that stole the attention of their teacher.

"Annyeong (hi)," he said spontaneously. His eyes locked on hers.

"Who is he?" little Yun asked. "Is he the teacher's boyfriend?"

Jiyeong interrupted, "Ahjusshi (mister), do you by any chance come from abroad?"

Yijung's eyes wide in surprise. "Oh, how did you know?"

"Then...did you come from Sweden?" she asked again, instead of answering him.

"Little miss, you're really amazing." He was starting to feel curious as to what she was getting at.

"Then you're him! Our teacher said that her boyfriend was there..." Jiyeong didn't get to finish her sentence because Gaeul rushed to cover her mouth but the secret was out nonetheless.

"You can't tell him that," Gaeul warned in a whisper. She sheepishly looked over to Yijung, who was grinning from ear to ear with the little kid's revelation. Her cheeks were a shade of crimson from the embarrassment.

"Teacher, you're blushing!" Yun teased, stirring a few laugh from his fellow classmates.

Yijung, obviously enjoying the interaction, was all smiling while his eyes fixated on her. Gaeul, on the other hand was baffling with Yijung's appearance in the middle of her class. Even though he was just keeping to his promise, even though she wanted to see him as much, but Gaeul wanted to be professional and not to have her personal life interfere with her work.

However Jiyeong was already a step ahead of her as she went towards Yijung and dragged him. "Ahjusshi, come and join us," she said.

"Can I?"

"Of course you can! The teacher said you're a potter, so you can teach us to make this stuff," Jiyeong said, to which Gaeul cringed.

_Jiyeong, you can't tell him that_, she silently monologues.

Yijung's smile grew wider as his eyes met hers. "I think you better sit down, Gaeul…sunsaengnim," he teased her. "Go on with your class and I'll just watch silently," he said and motioned her to sit, while he stood behind her chair.

Gaeul sat back and have her class to settle down as well to continue their class. Gaeul squirmed all the while as she can feel his eyes on her. Anxious and unease, she could barely concentrate on her lesson.

Yun tried to initiate a conversation with Yijung by asking, "Ahjusshi, what's your name?" Just then, the bell rang and his question was left unanswered.

Gaeul heaved a sigh of relief. _Saved by the bell, _she mused. "Kids, go and wash your hands before packing up. Leave the clays on the table and I will clean them up later," she instructed.

"Yes teacher!" the kids answered in chorus and ran off to the bathroom, leaving the two love birds standing next to each other in an awkward silence.

"How are you?" she finally asked.

"Have you been well?" he said at the same time.

Both smiled to each other meaningfully, words failed them. The kids came back within minutes, filling the entire room with their screams. The kids soon left one by one with their parents and nannies until only Yun was left behind.

Yijung took a quick glance at his wristwatch and realized he was late for his other appointment. "Gaeul yang, there's a lot of things that I want to say to you, but I don't think I'd be able to do it now. Can we meet tonight?" he asked.

Gaeul nodded her agreement. Woobin has mentioned about this earlier, something to do with Junpyo proposing to Jandi, her best friend. It had also been a while since the F4 gathered up, so Gaeul know how important this was for him. "Gayo (just go), we'll meet tonight," she said to him.

Yijung turned his attention to the little boy that sat still on his chair. "Little kid, my name is So Yijung. You're Yun right?" he did paid attention when Gaeul had spoken to Yun earlier.

"Yes (neh), ahjusshi."

"It's nice to meet you. I'll see you soon," he said and gave Gaeul a wink before leaving with a wicked grin.

****

"Yo, Yijung my bro! You're finally home." Woobin enveloped Yijung in a strong embrace and gave a few pats on the shoulder of Yijung.

Woobin arrived just in time when Yijung came out of his car, looking like a badass bad boy from abroad. He had intended to drop by the kindergarten and meet Gaeul first before meeting up with the guys, but he knew better that the person she wished to meet was Yijung, not him. Yijung, on the other hand had confided that the first person he wanted to see after returning home was her. It was obvious they missed each other. They needed the time alone.

A surge of guilt crept into his heart and tugged in deep. Yijung was not only a dear childhood friend, rather a brother that grew up with him for the past 20 years. If he was to hurt this man in any way, Woobin don't think he could forgive himself. To keep his distance from Gaeul as of now was the best thing to do.

Flashback

"_Please assign me for the job in Hong Kong, abeoji (father)." Woobin held his head low, acknowledging the fact that it was a plea instead of a request._

_Song Jin Woo raised an eyebrow to his son. His sharp gaze bore through Woobin intensely. "Why are you suddenly showing interest when you rejected the offer the last time?"_

_When Yijung went away, he made a promise to look after Gaeul in his place. Now that Yijung's back, he has no more responsibility towards her. What's more, staying in Seoul will threatened his friendship with Yijung. Yijung might see through him, his feelings, his secret, and his weakness – Gaeul. _

"_I have my reasons, father. I promise, if you give me this chance I'll do a great job, just as I've always been," Woobin said confidently._

_Song Jin Woo propped his hands on his chin. "On one condition," his father said finally. _

"_I'll agree to any of your term," Woobin said without a hint of hesitation._

"_Two years," his father began, "you are to stay there for that period of time, and do not return under any circumstances. If you manage to elevate the company's name in Hong Kong in two years time, consider you've secured the position as my successor. If not, I'm not hesitant to replace you," his father warned. _

_Woobin nodded, "I understand, father."_

_When Woobin turned to left the office, his father spoke up again, "And son, you know I never interfere in any of your personal business, but stay away from that girl. You know whom I was referring to, right?" he asked. "Stop seeing her. I gave you four years, didn't I? Do not challenge me."_

_Woobin only managed to gape at his father. _

End of flashback.

Jihoo was next in line for the warm welcome hug. "How you've been?" he said to Yijung.

"I've been well. I'm not sure if I changed much but you guys definitely did," he commented upon seeing Jihoo's medical trainee outfit.

Jihoo, his eyes fixated on the couple standing by the beach, replied "Everyone did."

****

Jandi strolled slowly down the beach and saw the image of his back. Like Gaeul who was missing Yijung for the past four years, Jandi has her own fair share of missing Junpyo too but she was better at keeping it less obvious. Maybe it was the fact that Junpyo's love for her was undeniably deep that it established a sense of security in her.

"Gu Junpyo?" she tentatively called out his name.

He turned around to the voice and his heavenly smile was noticeable. "You took five minutes!" he complained. "Can't you walk faster?"

Jandi walked towards him and stood face to face with him, "Gu Junypo, what happened?" _You're here_, she thought.

"What do you mean? This Gu Junpyo came back for his Geum Jandi," he said. He took her into his arms and whispered the words, "I missed you to death. I'm never letting you go again." Jandi smiled blissfully to the warmth of his embrace and felt his earnestness. "Did you remember your promise?" he asked as he slowly broke away the hug, "that you'd take responsibility of me?" he said, half jokingly.

"If my memory serves me right, I remembered saying I'll think about it. I didn't say I'd take responsibility of you," she shot back.

"You have a bad memory but you remembered that well," he said.

"In my memory, there was another condition," she added. "That is for you to come back as a really amazing guy."

Junpyo smiled and went down on his knees. He took out a ring box and surprised Jandi with his proposal, "Will you marry this Gu Junpyo?"

It was then Jihoo's voice interjected, "I object to this proposal."

"I object too." Yijung's voice came next.

"Me too!" Woobin added.

Junpyo and Jandi both broke into a smile when the three men came and joined them.

"Ah, can't believe you guys are getting married soon," Woobin said.

"I haven't said yes to the proposal." Jandi scoffed.

Junpyo winced. "It's not like you have any other choice, so you should be grateful I was willing," he dumbly remarked and stirred a giggle between the guys.

"Then just go. Go and marry other rich woman. I don't need you, you know," she lied.

Junpyo scratched his hair in frustration. "Well, I'm successful, wealthier and better than before so the answer should be yes," he said softly.

"Gu Junpyo, you should stop thinking that the world revolve around you, you know." she said.

"I don't think the world revolves around me," he said, "but you are," he added and earned a pinch from her.

"Gu Junpyo!"

****

"Achoo~!" she sneezed. She was perfectly fine the entire day until she caught a sudden cold by the evening and now she has a runny nose and a fever. Gaeul felt her head heavy and dizzy. God, she was supposed to meet up with Yijung tonight, but there was no news from him whatsoever after he left that afternoon. Four years of waiting does not equal to another hour of waiting knowing he was finally home but nowhere to be seen.

Ding dong. Her doorbell rang and gave her a little startle. _It can't be Yijung sunbae, is it? He doesn't know where I live? _she pondered, before heading towards the door and called out, "Nuguseyo (who's there)?"

Silence. There was no reply. Gaeul grew anxious and her thoughts ran wild. What if it was some bad guy from the neighborhood trying to rob her or something? But it seems like a perfectly safe and peaceful community. When she finally braced herself to open the door, the person standing there proved to bring smile upon her. She felt her heart swelled with joy and bliss.

"Sunbae." It was him.

Yijung gave a slight pout and furrowed his brow. "Gaeul yang, you sure took a long time to answer the door," he complained.

Gaeul smiled weakly to him. "Mian (sorry), I wasn't expecting you to suddenly appear at my doorstep," she managed. Her cheeks reddened, but not for the reason of her running fever. "How did you…"

"Woobin told me," he cut her off. "I was going to call, but then it wouldn't be much of a surprise," he admitted. A quick glance at her, he realized she has a red nose and a pale lips, she was even a little sweaty. "Are you okay? Why is your face as white as ghost?" he asked.

Gaeul touched both of her cheeks and sighed. "I think I have a fever. Sunbae, I don't think we can have the talk you want tonight," she replied. "I think I want to lie down for a while. Thankfully its Saturday tomorrow so I don't have any class," she added.

"Go in and have a rest. I'll be back soon, just leave the door unlock," he said before running down the hall in a hurry and left her confused.

When he did come back fifteen minutes later, Gaeul already dozed off on her sofa waiting for him. Yijung knelt beside the sofa and felt her forehead with the back of his hand. It was practically burning. He wondered if he should wake her up to take the cold medicine he bought from the pharmacy or to just let her sleep soundly.

The peaceful look she had on her face as she continue to sleep made him felt at lost. He eventually took out the cold fever paste and put it on her forehead before heading to the kitchen with the cold medicine on his hand. When he opened the fridge in the kitchen, another thought ran through him, have she eaten? Judging from the way she looked earlier, she might not have eaten anything for dinner.

****

"Annyeonghaseyo (hello). Geseyo (anyone here)?" Yijung said politely.

Master came out of the kitchen in hurry. "Prince So Yijung!" he said in a cheerful voice. "The porridge is ready and you can take it to her now," he added.

Yijung was a little taken aback. "Eh?"

Master scratched the back of his head nervously. He was not really a psychic in any sense, but he does have these random visions from time to time that he can't control. He knew Gaeul was sick and that Yijung would came to buy her porridge, so he had prepared the food in advance and waited for his arrival. "Just take it to her," master responded and handed over the food container to Yijung.

Yijung dismissed the thoughts altogether and took what he came for instead. "I didn't know making a simple porridge can be so hard," Yijung said, remembering the little chaotic scene he left in Gaeul's kitchen back home. He felt defeated when he went out and came to master for his porridge as an alternative. "How much is this?" he asked.

Master shook his head hurriedly, "No, it's from me for Gaeul. She's like a sister to me after all," he said. "You just go now and feed her," master said with a smile.

Yijung bowed to him slightly. "Thank you. It was nice to meet you again, master."

****

Author's note: I am sorry for taking quite some time to update. I always does this when I'm in the middle of writing a story, I get sidetracked very easily.. I just hope I'd be able to end this story soon and I promised it's soeul couple all the way :D Let's just keep our fingers crossed for them to be in a project together and keep the love for us the soeul fans. Have a good day.


	16. Chapter Twelve: Man in love

**Chapter twelve: Man in love**

Yijung sat on the edge of the bed and observed closely on Gaeul sleeping feature. Funny that the playboy he was, it was his first time to carry a woman to her bed. The flowery scent of her hair as he carried her in his arms deeply engraved in his memory. With a measured hesitant, he gently caressed her soft pale cheek.

_This woman, I wonder if she knows that she got me thinking about her constantly and go crazy with the thoughts of her. When did I start feeling this way? When did she become such an important part of me? Right now, I feel like she's the air that I need to breathe in order to live on._

"Gaeul yang, do you know how much I dislike you from the moment we met? You are exactly the kind of girl I want to stay away from. Conventional and naive, the kind of girl that break easily like fragile glass, yet strong headed and gullible at the same time. You make me feel all sort of emotions that I don't recognize before, you really scared me," he murmured. _I didn't know it before, but I think it was because I was already falling for you back then._ "What about you? Are your feelings for me is just a silly crush that will fade in time, or is it for real and long lasting?"

When she stirred and muffled a soft sigh, Yijung flinched and drew back his hands. He went still for a moment until she settled back into her sleep. "It was hard," he said into the silence night. "Being away for four years and not able to see you in that meantime was hard. There were a lot of things that I wanted to say, but I get tongue-tied every time I stand before you. None came out the way I planned," he said with a sigh.

"Like how did you cope the years when I was not around? Have you cry and having no one to wipe your tears and comfort you? Did any guy make a move on you? And most importantly…have you found that soulmate of yours? There were these crazy thoughts that irate me that I'm restless and jealous for no reason." He took her hand in his and rested it to his chest. "Did you feel that? The sound of my heartbeat when I'm with you. I'm afraid I haven't change from the last time. I am still cowardly when it comes to love. I can't say it out loud, the words that I wanted to say. But I'm going to let you see, my heart, with my actions instead." The moment he muttered the last word, Yijung planted a soft kiss on her lips.

****

Gaeul woke up that morning with a heavy sensation on her head. Her eyes gradually flutter opened and she stared at the ceiling for a while. She had the sweetest dream last night. Yijung was holding her hand to his chest and murmured sweet nothings into her ears. _If only that had happened in reality_, she thought. She forced herself to sit up on her bed when the fever patch dropped to her lap. "What's this? When did I get this?"

Flashback

"_Go in and have a rest. I'll be back soon, just leave the door unlock," Yijung said in a rush._

End of flashback

_Did he come back last night?_

The sound of her sudden grumbling stomach filled the entire room. Gaeul realized she hadn't eaten anything since last night and she was starving. Slowly getting onto her feet, Gaeul noticed a small note on the table by the side of her bed.

'I left a bowl of porridge in the kitchen for you. I went to master's porridge shop to get it last night. I heated it before I leave so you can have it nice and warm. Sorry I made a mess in your kitchen last night but I cleaned it up so don't worry. To make up for last night, we need to set another date to meet. I'll come by later to check up on you. PS: Don't you dare to fall sick like this again. You're a one heavy girl, you know. ^o^v

-Yijung'

Gaeul chuckled upon reading his note. A tiny gasp escaped her as it dawned on her. _Omo, did he carry me to bed?_

****

Later into the afternoon, her fever has steadily gone down and she managed to finish the bowl of porridge he left. Technically, he didn't make it but he did heat the porridge for her, and the fever patch, she felt like such a dork for being giddy from the pleasure. Gaeul even squealed everytime she re-read his notes.

Ding dong. Her doorbell rang. Gaeul sprinted towards the door and halted in time before she leisurely opened the door with a broad smile on her face. Her face dropped as soon as the man at the door was visible. She heaved a quiet sigh before forcing a smile and greeted him, "Sunbae."

"Sorry I'm not the person you hope I was," he replied in dismay.

"Aniya, don't say that. It's just that…" Gaeul scratched her non-itchy head trying to figure out an excuse to cover up her disappointment. She was going to mention that Yijung left a note saying he'd drop by later, but decided against it. "Anyway, you're back!" she changed the subject instead and invited him in, "Come on in."

"I'm not going to stay here for long." Woobin stay rooted. "I'm leaving in 2 more hours. I'm going back to Hong Kong."

Gaeul gaped at him in surprise. "Wha- Why?"

Woobin smiled weakly. "Father's order." It wasn't a total lie.

"Oh, but when are you coming back?" she said light heartedly, oblivious to his gloomy face.

"After 2 years," he said.

Her jaws dropped. "2 years?! Why would you be gone for so long?" she asked.

He shrugged. "For the past few years, I feel that everyone is a step ahead of me and I'm being left behind. Everyone seems to be achieving their dream, yet I'm still on the same pace as I was four years ago. Yijung is back as an even better potter. Jihoo is going to graduate from med school soon. Even the obnoxious Gu Junpyo has become a successful businessman. As a member of the prestigious F4, I need to accomplish something too. This is my chance," he laid it out to her.

"Woobin sunbae, without all the acknowledgeable achievement, you're already a great man. But I wish you all the best in Hong Kong. I'm sure when it comes to hard work no one can beat you, sunbae. Just don't tire yourself and don't get sick."

"Gaeul yang, can I ask something from you?"

"Eh? Su-sure," Gaeul replied tentatively. The gleam in his eyes was a mix of melancholy and daunting, she wasn't sure what to expect from him.

"Can I hug you?" He wasn't waiting for her answer as he tugged her into his arms and squeezed his eyes tightly.

"Sunbae…" she said in a whisper. Gaeul was baffled whether to push him away or to let him broke away the hug.

"I'm going to miss everyone." _Especially you._ "I'm so scared that if I leave now, no one is going to miss me. My absent won't leave any impact and everyone will carry on with their life as usual."

"Don't worry sunbae, we're not going anywhere. We will still be here when you come back, F4 sunbae and I. We sure will miss you a lot." She reassured him with a pat on his back.

****

He knew this was a sign of weakness and it can't be good. He was running away but what choice does he have? His heart was suffering a severe ache. If he was to stay, he might not be able to hold it in. It was the first time for him, to feel so out of control.

Flashback

"_Mwoh (what)?!" Junpyo cried out. "I've just come back and the F4 is reuniting, but you're leaving next thing in the morning?"_

"_I'm sorry. And I won't be back for two years. That was the deal." _

_Junpyo scorned. "Wah, two years? You've got to be kidding me. And what about my wedding? You won't be able to attend when you're one of my best men?"_

_Woobin let his gaze fell on the floor. He refused to meet their eyes and revealed the truth. "I think so," he said with a choking feel of guilt. "Growing up together, I always tell myself to stay close to you guys so I can look out for everyone. But I've come to realize lately that I don't reasons to worry anymore. We all can take care of ourselves now. So, I've decided it's time to move forward, be on par with you guys so I don't bring shame to the name of F4."  
_

_This time Jihoo spoke up, "What do you mean by that? Do you even know what F4 means? The wealth, the name, they're all a bonus, our friendship is the real deal. F4 is founded based on our friendship, not on assets. If this is what you want to do, then go. Don't use the F4 as an excuse."_

"_Yah, you don't have to be so harsh on him," Junpyo interjected._

"_No, Jihoo is right. I shouldn't use F4 as an excuse for my decision to leave. I really want to do this, to prove to my father that I am worth it. And I want to do something big so that everyone can be proud of me." _

"_Song Woobin, do you know what a precious friend you are? Just don't forget that," Junpyo said. "And I'm not going to have a wedding without you, so I'll postpone it just for you," Junpyo added. That and the fact that Jandi had requested for more time, she insisted that she'd think about it instead of rushing into marriage. She wanted to at least graduate from med school before taking the next step, which means Junypo will have to wait for a long, long time._

_Think again, Junpyo. You might look down on me if you only know, Woobin mused._

End of flashback

_Chu Gaeul, why did you come into my world as a woman that Yijung love? Why did I meet you after accepting that I was not meant for that happiness? And why did my stubborn heart won't listen to any reasoning? Other than the F4, I don't think anyone else would pay attention to me personally. All they see in me is the great Song Woobin, the heir of the Song company, not the man I am inside. When I met you Gaeul yang, you see me as a simple guy, a human. In the past, when I'm lonely there was no one to get rid of that overwhelming feel of emptiness. When you came, just a smile from you, the world feels brighter and lighter, I'm actually glad to be breathing the same air as you. With all these feelings, how am I going to face Yijung in the future?_

The sound of the familiar footsteps woke him up from his trance. Woobin had to crane his neck to meet his eyes. "Yijung ah."

Yijung smirked. "You were going to leave without a proper goodbye to your best buddy? And you didn't even tell me last night."

"I knew you had a meeting with Gaeul last night, so I don't want to bother you guys." _And I know you didn't leave til this morning_, he silently monologues.

"What's with the sudden decision to leave?" Yijung asked and took the seat beside him. "It just doesn't seem like you at all. Junpyo and I just came back from abroad, and you choose this time to go, there's a reason to it right?"

Woobin was sick of repeating himself, especially when he had to lie all over again. "Can I, just this once, leave without a clear reason and no one will question it?"

Yijung felt the sudden urge to interrogate but he withheld. Woobin was never one to talk about anything that distressed him and Yijung didn't feel right to pressure him at the moment. "Call me when you get there. Call me if you get into trouble. Call me if you need someone to talk to. Or you can just call me when there's nothing to do," Yijung said finally.

Woobin chuckled. "You sounded like a niggling girlfriend," he joked. When his laughter subsided, his voice took a turn into serious tone, "Remember the night that you came to my house, right before you leave for Sweden? You asked me a favor – to take care of Gaeul yang."

Yijung's brow furrowed. "Oh. Why?"

_You should have warned me against her. You should have told me it's really easy to fall in love her._ "Now, it's your turn," Woobin said, "to take care of her. Now that you're back, she's your responsibility. You said you want to be able to protect her once your home right? This is it. I care for her like a brother would care for his sister, so make sure you don't hurt her. Or you're going to face me." He cringed inside for saying she was like a sister to him.

"You don't have to worry about that," Yijung quietly assured him.

****

When the flight announcement was made, Woobin stood up and carried his bag on one shoulder. "I gotta go now. Wish me luck," he said to Yijung before hugging him tightly.

"Good luck. And take care," Yijung said.

"Araso. You too."

Woobin strolled towards the gate and turned to Yijung's direction. "Go now, I'll be fine," he mouthed.

Yijung hesitated for a second before nodding and took a leave. Woobin heaved a relief sigh. It was hard to sit next to Yijung and talk about the same girl that make their heart beats faster. This would be the last, he swore to himself. When he comes back, Gaeul would be just an ordinary friend. He vowed to get rid of all those ridiculous feelings.

As he walked away from his spot, a woman walked passed him. Pretty long legs fitted with yellow high heels, knee length denim shorts paired with a white top. Long dark hair with big curls down her shoulders, she was exactly a paragon of beauty. The fresh air of Korea brought a smile to her full luscious lips.

_I'm finally here_, she said to herself.


	17. Chapter thirteen: A heart that cannot be

Author's note:

OMG~!

First of all, I am deeply sorry for the unannounced one month hiatus. I went into a stage of deep laziness that I just can't seem to come out of it until recently. And I was having a writer's block that I can't even manage a chapter. Though I am not entirely sure if this chapter is worth the wait, I just hope everyone enjoy it. _"

Thank you for reading.

________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

**Chapter thirteen: A heart that cannot be hidden**

Her eyes gradually fluttered open at the sound of the heavy downpour. Gaeul sat up on the couch in a daze and took a quick glance at the clock on the wall. _6 pm_, she thought. It was already this late and she fell asleep on the couch, but he didn't come. _Maybe something came up_, she told herself. The note clearly stated he'd dropped by later but he didn't say when, so she shouldn't feel concerned, yet Gaeul felt unease for some reason.

****

Yijung silently gazed faraway outside, watching as the rain blew against the window. Yijung had always loved the smell of the moist air when it rained, and the chill wind felt so familiarly soothing. His thoughts wandered to that of Woobin. Something about Woobin's dull face earlier alarmed him. Growing up, when everyone was down in the dumps, Woobin will be the only one unaffected by it and wore a happy face that tried to cheer everyone up. Because Woobin had always been the dependable big brother in the group, Yijung felt as if he had took him for granted all these years.

"Yijung-ah," the soft voice called out from behind.

Yijung turned to his back and gave a polite bow to the old man standing in front of him. "Annyeong haseoyo, harabeoji (grandfather)," he greeted him.

"Oh, Yijung-ah. It's really a wonder to see you staying at home at this hour," the old man remarked, half teasing. "Did your mother called you home?" he then asked.

Yijung smiled awkwardly. "Yes, she said she wants to have a family dinner to celebrate my homecoming," he replied simply.

Yijung hadn't seen the old man in years but it seemed like he had managed his health well. Yijung couldn't recall the last time they had a talk, but in his memory his grandfather had always been a calm and quiet person. He never meddled in anything that went around in the house, especially the broken marriage of his parents. Though he had previously resented him for that, Yijung later learnt to appreciate his action, because there weren't anything left to salvage anyway.

His grandfather nodded slightly. "Let's just hope this time the family dinner stays as family dinner. I didn't come all the way from Busan to watch another dramatic scene," he commented and Yijung knew perfectly well what he had meant.

There was a pregnant pause. "Harabeoji, it's rare to see you back to the mansion. Did something happen?" Yijung questioned. His grandfather couldn't have came back for a simple family dinner, there ought to be a real reason behind it. "Did mother called you home too?" he quickly added.

His grandfather let out a small sigh, "Your mother has her own reasons for everything, you just be good to her." He then cleared out his throat and changed the topic, "Now that you've come back from Sweden, you should change your way of life. I hate to say this but you've become too much like your father," he went on. While his grandfather continued on his nagging, Yijung's gaze fell on the floor and his thoughts wandered off to his father.

Flashback

_His eyes were bulging in deep hatred, and the fire in his heart escalated. "Have you ever lived your life properly even for a moment?"_

_So Hyunsub sneered, "There was only one woman who made me want to live right." Their eyes met when he stressed out, "If you let that one woman go, the others will be just the same, nothing but worthless repetitions." _

End of flashback

For once in his whole life, he had to admit that his father was right. The real things only came once, and there was only one person that made Yijung felt he wanted to cherish his life.

****

As much as he wished for the dinner to go well, it didn't happen the way he had hoped. It was a strain right from the start. They had to wait a good ten minute before So Hyunsub finally made an appearance. And Yijung didn't miss the glaring exchange between both of his parents when they were moving on to the dinner table.

During the whole course, his heart was aching to ask what had happened during the family meeting that caused so much pain for Eunjae and Ilhyun, but he held back. The quiet atmosphere was already too much to bear. A question like that will just exploded in everyone's face and all hell will break loose. Besides, he wasn't really in any position to demand an answer, especially when the person in question didn't come today. But Yijung had a feeling, he wasn't even invited.

Yijung later rushed out of the mansion as soon as the dinner session ended. He needed to breathe, far away from the all façade in the mansion. Before his mother even managed to grab hold of him, Yijung slipped out of the house unknowingly and drove away in his orange Lotus Exige, to a place where his heart yearned for.

****

She was flushed with anticipation when the door bell rang. There was a silent tick that made her felt momentarily numbness. Her instinct told her, she'd be smiling when the door was opened. And she did.

****

"Jim…jilbang (public bath house)?" he ridiculed.

When he had arrived to her place earlier, neither of them can strike up a casual conversation so she had suggested that they went out to someplace instead. He didn't expect this. Even after four years, she never failed to amaze him. Maybe that was why, she had always occupied a special place in his heart, even from the beginning.

Gaeul beamed excitedly and nodded. "Oh. Since it's summer, it's only natural to go to jimjilbang, to refresh ourselves," she explained. "Heal heat with heat, don't you know?"

"But…" he tried to protest when she was already pulling him and urged him to go inside.

Thankfully, there weren't too many people there today, only some elderly couples trying to get some rest. Gaeul stole a glance at Yijung. He was eyeing every corner, either he was afraid of being recognized by the public or trying to figure out the place. When he came out of the dressing room earlier, Gaeul burst out in laughter to see his gawky appearance with that matching blue shirts and pants. Though he didn't commented on the clothes, Gaeul can feel his discomfiture and his struggle to blend in.

"Sunbae," she suddenly said, "let's play a game."

Yijung arched an eyebrow and stared at her with a questioning look. "Game?"

She nodded enthusiastically. "Don't you feel boring just sitting here doing nothing?" she added.

"You're the one that brought me here," he said jokingly. When there was a visible pout on her lips, Yijung gave in. "What game?" he then asked.

The pout turned into a wide grin. "The truth game."

"Ah," he said in recognition to the game he once played with her and the others during Jandi's housewarming. "And the penalty?" he quickly added. "Kiss?" he suggested, smirking devilishly.

Gaeul squinted disapprovingly, nonetheless giddy inside at the mere suggestion.

"Or would you rather a flick on your head?" he asked, with a hand motion.

Gaeul's eyes widened in surprise. She remembered how the tin bent when Yijung flicked on it the last time. She scratched her non-itchy head, trying to figure out a penalty that won't cause her either pain or humiliation. "Ah!" an idea struck her like a bolt of lightning. "The loser has to grant a wish from the winner, whatever it is," she suggested.

_A wish, huh? _He thought. It wasn't a bad idea after all, if he won the game he can ask anything from her. "Deal!" he agreed in a flash.

Gaeul giggled in excitement. She took a moment and raked through her brain for a worthwhile question to ask him, but the result came out blank. "Sunbae," she then started to say, "mm…which one is prettier, Korean girl or Swedish girl?" it was a poor attempt but she tried her best.

Yijung can't help but to laugh at her. "Gaeul yang, are you really curious about that? Isn't there anything else that you're curious about? Wouldn't it be a waste to ask for this kind of question?" he asked. "I'll give you another chance. If you want to change the question, do it now," he added, a challenging tone in his voice.

She pondered on it for a moment and bit her lips tentatively. Will it be alright to muster up the courage and ask him this, just this once? Gaeul looked up and met his eyes. Even though her heartbeat soared and she had difficulty breathing and her head was in a jumble, she didn't take off her eyes. "Was I the first person you come to when you came back?" the question came out naturally, and her face was a mask of solemn. It was certainly a question that haunted her for days after his homecoming.

There was only silence on his part. They eyes fixed on each other when he purposely asked, "Is that what you're truly curious about?" When she nodded silently, Yijung said to her "Yes, because I made a promise."

Gaeul felt her heart swelled in sweet blissfulness.

He smirked and felt his own heartbeat increased rapidly at the mere of her smile. "My turn now, right?" He paused for a minute to gather up his own courage. "Gaeul yang, have you meet that...soulmate?"

Gaeul took a moment to collect her thought. "Truthfully, no. I have yet to meet someone who is willing to carry all the burden in the world with me, someone who is willing to laugh and cry with me until we reach our golden age, someone I can sit quietly with at the end of the day and feel comfortable with it, someone so important that even life seems such a trivial thing before it."

Though her answer made sense, Yijung was crestfallen. Deep down, he had wished the answer to be different. But she was right. It seemed like they had been playing pulling the rope game, when one came forward, the other back away. And they were both unable to take it to the next level. Their short interactions and the four years distance wouldn't add up for a strong sense of connection to just appear. Their feelings for each other were visible, but it wasn't enough.

****

They remained silent during the ride home that Gaeul started to regret her answer earlier. Could he be mad about that? But he didn't seem angry, dejected perhaps? Gaeul had really wanted to tell him she had always been wanting for him to be the one, but she kept holding back. Even when so much had happened between them, the fear of another rejection overwhelmed her. He did tell her once, she was against the three rules he set for his woman. She wasn't ready for her heart to be trampled on all over again.

Still, he was being polite 'til the end he even opened the door for her. She turned to leave after a short goodbye and walked towards the gate when he cried out from a distant, "Gaeul yang!"

She turned to look at him, her eyes squinted in curiosity.

This time, it cannot be hidden. His heart was beating out loud the unspoken truth and he chose to let his guard down. Somehow it was easier when she wasn't in a close distance, that he felt he could let it out. "Then, can I be the one? Someone to carry your burden, someone to laugh and cry with you even after we grow old, someone you can just sit quietly with and still feel comfortable and become so important that you can't life without? I might sound cocky, but I have the confidence now. I will work hard for your heart to trust in me."

_The So Yijung that I like is like a child, afraid to love and being hurt. But that child is gone now, he has grown into a man who can finally admit his feelings. And I'm in love with this man._


End file.
